


Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

by Cheriluvs10



Series: A Family In Indiana [1]
Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-06
Updated: 2014-08-06
Packaged: 2018-02-12 02:05:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 28
Words: 47,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2091699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cheriluvs10/pseuds/Cheriluvs10
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eleven/River and Amy/Rory. Crackfic. The Doctor decides to take his wife and inlaws to America to experience Thanksgiving at somebody's house. Unfortunately, he ends up getting more than he bargained for. FINISHED.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116082) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116082)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=1) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter One  
  
Amy and Rory were sitting with River in the TARDIS lounge chatting and catching up on what had happened since they last saw each other. Suddenly, the Doctor burst into the room and rushed over to them.  
  
"I HAVE AN IDEA!" he bellowed at them.  
  
Everyone fell silent and stared at him while the Doctor looked around, waiting for his wife and in-laws to speak.  
  
"What is your idea?" Amy finally said when the Doctor just kept staring at them like a grinning goon.  
  
"THANKSGIVING!" the Doctor yelled. "Have you ever experienced an American thanksgiving celebration with turkey and all the trimmings?"  
  
"Um…no," Amy said.  
  
"Well, we must go and experience it then!" he said, grabbing hold of Rory with a manic look on his face.  
  
Amy snickered at the shocked look on her husband's face.  
  
"Okay," Rory said, not sure how to respond to the Doctor.  
  
"So…we go to America and eat at a restaurant then?" Amy said.  
  
"No, we go find a house and eat with the people inside it," the Doctor said, letting go of Rory.  
  
He stepped back and gave them all a "Damn, I'm good," look while his three companions looked at each other.  
  
"And do you have a house in mind, sweetie?" River said.  
  
"Nah. We just go to a random location, find a random house and ask to come and eat with them," the Doctor said.  
  
"And get shot dead because we'll be seen as a bunch of crazies by the random Americans," Amy said.  
  
"No," the Doctor said. "We will use our perceived Britishness to our advantage."  
  
"Oh…I see," Amy said. "We knock on a door and when they open it, we'll say, "Cheers Gov, we're a bunch of lost Brits and we're absolutely peckish. We notice it's the time when you Colonials celebrate your Thanksgiving so can we have some of your Yank turkey, mates?"  
  
"Exactly!" the Doctor said.  
  
His companions looked at him as if his head had been replaced by his bow tie.  
  
"Come on, it'll be an adventure," the Doctor said, looking at each of them in turn. "River, you love adventure!"  
  
"I also love breathing and staying alive," River said. "I think my daughter is right about getting shot when we try to barge in on someone's dinner."  
  
"No, we'll be friendly. We can be friendly, right?" the Doctor said.  
  
"And where in America are we going?" Amy said.  
  
"Random location?" the Doctor said, shrugging.  
  
"So we're going to God knows where and eating with God knows who just so you can have some turkey," Rory said.  
  
"Beats eating in a restaurant," the Doctor said.  
  
"And what's wrong with here?" Amy said, pointing down to the floor. "Why not recreate Thanksgiving inside here?"  
  
"Because I wanna meet people," the Doctor said. "I see you lot every day."  
  
"That's true but at least I know you lot and know you won't shoot me for trespassing," Amy said.  
  
"We'll be charming and talk our way into a house," the Doctor said.  
  
"Heh, you first, mate," Rory said. "I'm with Amy on this one."  
  
"River? Please?" the Doctor said as he walked over to her.  
  
He bent down to her face and batted his eyelashes.  
  
"Will you behave?" River said.  
  
"What's that supposed to mean?" the Doctor said.  
  
"It means that if anyone has any reason to shoot us it'll be because you'll be acting like a lunatic and scaring the pants off them," River said. "I'll come if you behave yourself."  
  
The Doctor straightened back up and gave her an indignant look.  
  
"I am the very model of decorum," he said.  
  
"Wow, he said that with a straight face, I'm impressed," Rory said to his wife and daughter.  
  
"Fine, if you want to sit here and rabbit on about…X Factor or whatever you bang on about, I'll go by myself," the Doctor said before striding out of the room.  
  
His companions watched him walk out of the room before River let out a world weary sigh and stood up.  
  
"Come on, mum and dad, we better go with him before he ends up getting shot in some distant American location," she said.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	2. Chapter 2

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116084) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116084)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=2) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Two  
  
The Doctor opened the TARDIS door and stuck his head out.  
  
"So…where are we?" Amy said as she stood behind him.  
  
"No idea but it's very cold and snowy and we're in a rural area," the Doctor said. "So…winter gear and boots then."  
  
He shut the door. Thirty minutes later, he opened it again and all of them stepped outside. There was about a foot of snow on the ground but the roads had been plowed and it was a sunny day. The air was chilly, however, and Amy shivered a moment when she stepped out the door. She looked around but the only sign of life she saw was a bunch of cows in a fenced in field to her left. Up ahead was another road that veered off to the left and the road they were on stretched into the distance with only a few trees to break up the monotony of white and fields. Off to her right was a fenced in field and far in the distance was a forest. The TARDIS was beside the empty field next to the road. They were standing in snow that was up to their shins.  
  
"So…we landed in the middle of nowhere," Amy said to the Doctor.  
  
"There is a house nearby, I asked the TARDIS to find one," the Doctor said.  
  
"No, there are cows nearby," Amy said, pointing to them. "Apparently, your ship gets confused."  
  
"There's a road up ahead. Maybe the house is down that road," the Doctor said, pointing to the second road.  
  
"Where?" Amy said, trying to see anything besides the cows.  
  
"We will walk and find out," the Doctor said as he picked his leg up and tried to walk through the deep snow. "Come on, it's an adventure."  
  
"Yeah, just keep telling yourself that," Amy muttered as everyone followed him.  
  
They managed to get out of the deep snow and onto the road. But the road had black ice on it and Amy gasped as she nearly fell on her ass.  
  
"Steady there, Pond," the Doctor said, grabbing her before she fell. "Be careful and watch where you walk."  
  
"Ya think?" Amy said.  
  
The Doctor let go but instead of heading for the road, he walked over to the fenced in area where the cows were trying to find something to graze on. To Amy's surprise, the Doctor began to low to the cows.  
  
"And what are you doing now?" Amy said as the others stepped off the road and sloughed over to him.  
  
"Asking the cows where the houses are," the Doctor said over his shoulder before he resumed his mooing.  
  
"You're asking cows for directions?" Rory said.  
  
"Yes, Williams, the cows would know, they've probably been here long enough," the Doctor said over his shoulder before turning his attention back to the cows.  
  
The cows mooed and the Doctor nodded and mooed back.  
  
"They said a house is up the other road about a mile from here," he said smugly to his companions. "See, I'm not like most males who don't stop to ask for directions."  
  
"No and most males don't get their directions from ruddy cows either," Amy said.  
  
"They're very reliable," the Doctor said, pointing to them. "They've been here for ages. Just trust me, Pond, I know what I'm doing. So let's crack on and find that house, eh?"  
  
"Wait, did the cows say where we are?" Amy said.  
  
The Doctor froze for a moment before turning back towards the cows.  
  
"He didn't even think to ask the cows where we're at," Amy said to Rory and River while the Doctor mooed again. "We're in big trouble, I just know it."  
  
"They said we're in Corntopia," the Doctor said after finishing his conversation.  
  
"What? Where's Corntopia?" Rory said. "I never even heard of that."  
  
"I believe it's the cows' name for wherever we are at the moment," the Doctor said.  
  
"So they don't know where we're at," Amy said.  
  
"We're in Corntopia, they just said that," the Doctor said. "You wouldn't expect them to use the same names as humans, do you?"  
  
"We're in very big trouble," Amy said to her family while the Doctor turned and walked away.  
  
"Come along, my family, lots to see in Corntopia," the Doctor called over his shoulder while he headed for the other road.  
  
"Oh yeah, there's just so much to see besides the cows and snow," Amy said while she followed the Doctor.  
  
They walked along behind the Doctor who was looking around as if the scenery was the most fascinating thing on the entire planet. River watched her husband before she eyed the snow at the side of the road. She gave her parents an impish grin, scooped up some of the snow in her gloved hand and hurried forward. She smeared the snow on the back of the Doctor's butt while Amy and Rory giggled. The Doctor gasped in surprise and turned to see River giving him a cheeky grin.  
  
"I don't like the color of your trousers, sweetie. White is more your color," she said, patting the shocked Doctor's face.  
  
The Doctor smirked and River hurried away when he thrust his hands into a nearby snowdrift and scooped up some snow. Amy and Rory tried to run while he eyed everyone as he made a huge snowball.  
  
"Trifle with me, will ye?" he said as he patted the snowball into shape. "I shall show you what happens when you muck with the Oncoming Storm."  
  
"Eh, you're all hot air," Amy said as she tried to back away from him.  
  
"Then why are you trying to get away from me then?" the Doctor said innocently while he slowly advanced on her. "If you're not afraid of me, why don't you stand your ground, Amelia?"  
  
"Because I'm a decoy," Amy said.  
  
The Doctor ducked just as Rory threw a snowball from behind. The projectile sailed over his head and splatted onto the road without making contact. The Doctor jerked back up and gave Amy a smug grin.  
  
"I know who's behind me and I know what they're doing," he said as he continued to walk towards her. "I haven't survived this long without honing my battle skills, you know. You, on the other hand, are an amateur compared to me."  
  
He grunted when a snowball smacked into his head from behind.  
  
"I'm not," River said smugly from behind him. "I have battle skills of my own, love."  
  
She giggled when an evil grin crept over the Doctor's face. He turned to face her and Amy grinned and hurried to make a snowball of her own.  
  
"I know what you're doing, Pond. Don't think I don't know," the Doctor said while he slowly walked towards River. "Throwing a snowball at me is futile."  
  
"Really? Seemed to work for my daughter just now," Amy called out as she grabbed a bunch of snow from a drift.  
  
The Doctor looked at Rory. He was standing on the road behind River, another snowball in his hand.  
  
"You're going down in defeat," Rory said to the Doctor. "There are three of us against just one of you."  
  
"Ha! But I am an army," the Doctor crowed. "I think I proved that much at Demon's Run. You can't stop me but I can stop all of you and bury you up to your necks in snowdrifts until you plead for mercy and I'll stand there and listen to your pleading and laugh and laugh until I wet myself and…"  
  
He felt the waistband of his trousers being pulled from behind. He turned slightly and looked at Amy who was now trying to put a handful of snow down into his pants. She gave him an innocent look while he eyed her.  
  
"I thought I saw a raccoon poking out of the top of your trousers," Amy said. "I was going to kill it with snow."  
  
"Pond…"  
  
He grunted when River's snowball slammed into the side of his face. Amy giggled and shoved the handful of snow into the other side of his face. The Doctor let out a deep roar and tried to look menacing while Amy ran from him.  
  
"I am…"  
  
The Doctor's awe-inspiring speech of doom while stopped when Rory hit him in the back of the head with his snowball. Grinning, the Doctor yelled at the top of his lungs while he ran off the road into the deep snow. He continued to roar while he flung snow up into the air.  
  
"Having a slight tantrum, husband?" River teased while the Doctor half laughed and half roared and flung the snow up into the air around him.  
  
"Doctor angry! Doctor smash!" the Doctor said in a deep voice while he flung the snow at the road.  
  
"Doctor barmy!" Amy said, imitating his deep voice while she joined him in the snow.  
  
The Doctor laughed and flung some snow at her. Amy flung some snow back and they threw handfuls of snow at one another while they laughed.  
  
"For once, I'm glad we're out in the middle of nowhere," Rory said to his daughter. "I can just imagine how many people would ring the asylum if they saw this."  
  
"Okay, I'm spent," the Doctor said as he flopped down into the snow and sat there.  
  
"Aren't you cold?" Amy asked as she stopped.  
  
"Yes, my arse is very, very cold at the moment, thanks for your concern," the Doctor said, looking at her.  
  
Amy grinned. She trudged through the snow and helped him to stand. She helped get the snow off his butt before the two of them trudged back up to the road. River took his hand and Rory took Amy's hand as they resumed their snowy hike.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	3. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116103) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116103)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=3) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Three  
  
Rory let out a groan when they finally reached the second road. Unlike the asphalt road they were on, the second road was dirt and gravel and hadn't been touched by the snowplows. They could see some tire tracks running through the snow but otherwise the snow on the road was just as high it was on the ground. They began to trudge down it and the Doctor let out a triumphant yell and pointed to a black shingled roof in the distance.  
  
"Ha, see! Cows don't lie," he crowed.  
  
"Yeah, a house about a mile away and the road isn't cleared off," Amy said.  
  
"Walk in the tire tracks then," the Doctor said. "Quit whinging, it's an adventure."  
  
"It's a cold adventure and I hope whoever lives inside that house lets us in," Rory muttered to his wife while they followed the Doctor and River.  
  
"Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way," the Doctor sang while they walked. "Oh what fun it'll be to eat some turkey throughout the day."  
  
"Trudging through the snow," Amy sang. "in the middle of God knows where. God, I'm really cold from my head to my derriere."  
  
The Doctor let go of River's hand and applauded that.  
  
"We'll get you on X Factor yet," he said.  
  
"Just get me in the TARDIS and I'll be happy with that," Amy replied.  
  
"Uh-oh, someone's coming," Rory said, looking back over shoulder when he saw a pickup truck turning onto the road.  
  
They walked to the edge of the road and stood together while the silver pickup truck drove towards them. As it passed, they saw a middle aged man in the driver's seat turn his head and give them an odd look. The truck slowly stopped once it got passed them and they saw a huge Rottweiler in the bed of the pickup truck and a little four year old girl in the passenger seat. The girl was staring at them out the back window with her finger up her nose. The driver backed the truck up to the Doctor and his companions and he rolled down the window.  
  
"Are you alright?" he asked in a gruff voice while the dog went to the edge of the bed and stared at them while panting heavily.  
  
"We're British," the Doctor said. "We're on a walking tour of America and we were wondering if you could give us a lift to house down the road?"  
  
"If you mean the brick house with the black roof, I live there," the man said. "What do you need? Are you out of gas?"  
  
"No, actually we're on a hike," the Doctor said. "And it's Thanksgiving so we wondered if perhaps we could share your meal?"  
  
"Well, first off, it's the day before Thanksgiving and we're not ready yet," the man said. "As for spending Thanksgiving with us, my wife and I are having our relatives over and they usually bring more than enough food. I'll talk to her but I'm sure It'll be alright. You have anywhere to stay?"  
  
"We have a car," the Doctor said. "But no hotel room, no."  
  
"And you're hiking? Now? In the middle of Bumblefuck, Indiana at this time of year? Don't ya see all the snow around you?"  
  
"Well, we're fans of a sport called Extreme Hiking," the Doctor said. "We hike many different climates all over the world."  
  
The man gave them an odd look before shrugging.  
  
"Personally, I'd go hiking in China before I came here but if that's your thing," he said. "Hop in the back, at the very least you can get warmed up and have something to eat and drink even if you can't stay for Thanksgiving."  
  
The Doctor thanked him.  
  
"Name's Jim, this here is my daughter, Mandy, beside me. The dog in the back is Rex. Just climb in and don't mind Rex, he won't hurt you."  
  
"Thank you. I'm the Doctor. This is my wife, River, and these are my friends, Amy and Rory."  
  
"Nice to meet you. Hop in back," he said, hooking his thumb back at the truck bed.  
  
"Thank God," Amy said as they walked around to the back of the truck.  
  
Rex came up to the gate and barked at them. The Doctor barked back while Amy and Rory climbed inside.  
  
"Rex said hello," the Doctor said as he and River got in. "He says he prefers to be called Reginald though, the humans saddled him with the name Rex."  
  
"I don't care what he's called, as long as he doesn't maul us," Amy said as she and her husband snuggled together by the back window.  
  
Rory looked at the window. Mandy was staring at him through the window while she continued to pick her nose.  
  
"Yeah, that's really lovely," Rory said dryly while Mandy pulled a bogey out of her nose and looked at it. "Are we going to have bogeys in the food then?"  
  
The Doctor and River huddled beside them and the Doctor smiled when Rex came up to him.  
  
"Guarding the family, Reggie?" he said as he scratched behind his ears. "You're a good doggie, yes, you are, a very good doggie indeed."  
  
Rex's tail wagged furiously and the Doctor chuckled when he licked his cheeks. The truck started up again and the four of them huddled against the back, trying to keep the wind from chilling them while Rex stood by the side of the bed and looked out. When they finally reached the house, they looked at it. It was a huge two story brick house that was sitting up on a slightly sloping hill. The surrounding property was vast. The Doctor estimated perhaps two acres in the front and more in the back. There was a cage to the right of the house that looked like it housed a large animal, although at the moment they couldn't see anything inside the cage except an enormous blue dog house.  
  
"Is that where Rex stays, maybe?" Amy yelled as she pointed to it.  
  
The truck turned into a long driveway and it went slowly up the gravel driveway and parked to the side of the house. There were numerous windows all over the house, including one big bay window in the front, directly beside the concrete porch. The porch had a wooden porch swing on it. In the back, they could see an aboveground swimming pool and swingset and slide that was covered with snow. There was also another dog house, a smaller white wooden one with a black shingle room that matched the house. There was a large brick patio attached to the back of the house and a wooden deck on the second floor. Beside the brick patio was a snowy hill of sand. At the edge of the property on all sides were barren fields and behind the house in the distance was a large forest. The Doctor and his family climbed out of the back while Jim and Mandy got out of the truck. Beside the driveway were brick steps that went up the hill to the porch. The Doctor and his family followed Jim and Mandy up the steps. While they walked, Mandy kept looking behind her and smiling and waving with her one free hand while her other one kept picking at her nose.  
  
"Mandy, stop that," Jim said when he noticed she was picking her nose. "Keep telling you not to do that."  
  
Mandy scowled as she took her finger out of her nose. They stepped up onto the porch and the Doctor looked across at the cage.  
  
"Is that Reg…I mean, Rex's kennel?" he said to Jim while he pointed to the cage.  
  
"No, that's our cougar, Spot," Jim said, nonchalantly.  
  
Amy's eyes boggled.  
  
"You have a cougar?" she said in disbelief.  
  
"Yeah. My cousin breeds them," Jim said while he opened the front door. "We got Spot when he was just a cub and he's a part of the family. He won't bother you if you don't bother him. Come inside."  
  
"A cougar?" Amy mouthed to her husband as they followed everyone inside. "Who are these people?"  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	4. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116106) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116106)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=4) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Four  
  
"Lori, we have company!" Jim yelled as they came into the house.  
  
Directly inside the door was a short hallway. Directly to their right was a small raised wall that went around the space where a staircase led downwards. Inside the hallway was a small wooden table and an old grandfather clock. Jim directed everyone to take off their winter gear and put the coats on the partition and the boots by the stairs. When they walked into the lounge, Amy made a face. The décor was from the 1970's including lime green shag carpeting, lime green drapes over the bay window and an orange sofa. At the back of the huge lounge was a long dining table with a metal chandelier over it. In the corner was a cabinet with a few knickknacks on it. Beside the sofa was a couple a reclinders, some old wooden tables and over by the partition was a huge TV on another wooden table. A little boy was sitting in front of the TV watching cartoons. He turned his head and looked at everyone when the came into the room. The boy looked like his father, dark hair and blue eyes with a plump face and slightly plump body.  
  
"That's Tom," Jim said, pointing to him before he went through a doorway off to their right. The Doctor peeked inside and noticed it was a kitchen. Directly beside the doorway was an olive green refrigerator and across from that was a stainless steel stove embedded in a formica countertop. Mounted in the wall to the right of it was a microwave and under that was the oven. At the back was another countertop with wooden cabinets above and a double sink. A woman with long brown hair was at the sink washing dishes. She looked over her shoulder and smiled at Jim as he came up to her and kissed her.  
  
"This is my wife, Lori," he said to the newcomers. "Lori, this is the Doctor, River, Amy and Rory. They want to spend Thanksgiving with us."  
  
Lori did a double take.  
  
"Are these relatives of yours?" she said to her husband.  
  
"No, ma'am, we're British," Amy said. "We're hiking across Indiana and we wanted to stop and spend Thanksgiving somewhere."  
  
"In the middle of winter? You must be really dedicated hikers," Lori said.  
  
"We're extreme hiking," the Doctor said. "It's a new sport."  
  
"Well…I guess you're welcome here. We're having a bunch of our relatives over tomorrow and we're making plenty of food and they're bringing in more. You'd have to sleep downstairs in the den. We have a fold out couch and we have sleeping bags you can use."  
  
"That sounds lovely," the Doctor said.  
  
"And if you don't mind, could you help out?" Lori said. "I'm trying to fix all this food, I could use the help."  
  
"We'd be delighted," Rory said while everyone else nodded.  
  
"I'll go rustle up some blankets and sleeping bags for them," Jim said. "There's another TV downstairs and a DVD player, you're welcome to it. We also have a fireplace down there and I can build a fire for you tonight."  
  
"Sounds great," the Doctor said.  
  
Jim left the room in search of bedding and the Doctor and his family came further into the kitchen. When they walked past the fridge, they could see another countertop with cabinets above it and four high chairs so people could sit and eat at the counter. Beyond that was a small wooden table, a wall phone, a small knickknack display of thimbles and a white wall clock. Off to the left of that was a sliding glass patio door leading to the second floor deck. On the deck were a few wooden deck chairs and a metal table, all snow-covered at the moment. The Doctor walked over to the dish rack beside the sink, grabbed a small towel and began to dry the wet dishes. Lori thanked him while Amy, Rory and River walked over to the kitchen table. Off to the right of the table was another doorway that led back into the living room and Tom was standing in it now, staring at the newcomers. Off in the distance, they heard Backstreet Boys playing and high-pitched giggling.  
  
"So, where are you from?" Lori asked the Doctor while they did the dishes.  
  
"I'm from London," the Doctor said.  
  
"Wow, I've never been there," Lori said. "I lived all my life in Indy."  
  
"You have to go sometime, London is brilliant," the Doctor said.  
  
"I'd feel so out of place there. I'm a country gal," Lori said. "I think I'd get lost there."  
  
"Nah, it's not that difficult to navigate. Not with so many famous landmarks there."  
  
"So, what kind of name is Doctor?" Lori said, looking at him while she pulled a small pot out of the soapy water.  
  
"It's an affectionate nickname," the Doctor said, smiling. "My real name is Bartholemew."  
  
"Ugh, I can see why you use Doctor then," Lori said while the Doctor chuckled. "So you're seeing the great state of Indiana then?"  
  
"Yup. I love the US, such an interesting country with interesting people."  
  
"Well, I hope you think that way about my relatives," Lori said.  
  
"Why? Are your relatives interesting as well?"  
  
Lori made a face.  
  
"You could say that," she said. "Me and Jim have strange families. Racists, alcoholics, people with anger management problems, you name it, we got it."  
  
"I've seen worse in my travels," the Doctor said. "I'm very much a people person. I love meeting new people."  
  
"Well, you won't be disappointed tomorrow. We have a full house so enjoy the space while it lasts," Lori said. "Thank you for helping me," she added when the Doctor dried the last dish and put it away.  
  
"No worries, I don't mind earning my keep," the Doctor said. "Whatever you need, I'll be happy to help."  
  
"Well…do you and your friends mind coming with me into town. I need to pick up a few groceries. And supposedly it's going to snow again," she said, glancing out the window. "We're out in the country and when it snows hard, sometimes it takes the plow awhile to get to us."  
  
"I'd be happy to help," the Doctor said, pleased that he was going to see more of the surrounding area. "How about it? You lot want to do a bit of shopping?"  
  
"We'll be happy to help," Amy said while she, River and Rory got up from the table.  
  
"Let me go tell Jim and we'll take my car," Lori said, wiping her hands on a dish towel before leaving the room.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	5. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116109) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116109)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=5) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Five  
  
Lori went downstairs to the garage and warmed up her car after opening the garage door. While she was doing that, the Doctor and his family walked into the living room. Off to the right was a long hallway with several rooms on either side of it and one room at the very end. The room at the very end had the music and laughter coming from it.  
  
Amy was standing beside Rory, waiting for Lori to come back when she felt someone tug on her jeans. She looked down and did a double take when Tom pulled down his pajama bottoms and underwear and showed her his tiny penis.  
  
"Pee pee," he said, pointing to it.  
  
"Yeah, that's nice, Tom," Amy said while her friends snickered. "Now pull your pants and jimjams back up, yeah?"  
  
She recoiled when Tom tried to touch her crouch with his finger.  
  
"You have girl parts," Tom said.  
  
"Yeah, don't touch them," Amy said while Rory snickered and held her close.  
  
River tried to help the little boy pull up his pants and pajama bottoms but he kicked them off and went back to the TV. He sat down on the floor and the Doctor giggled when he watched the TV half dressed.  
  
"Look closely, Rory, this is what you have to deal with when you have children," Amy said, pointing to Tom.  
  
"He just feels like relaxing and being free of clothes for a bit, what's wrong with that," Rory said.  
  
"Nothing at all," the Doctor said.  
  
The Doctor frowned when Amy jerked her head around and stared at him with wide eyes.  
  
"You don't agree with that?" he said to her.  
  
"No, I figured after you said that, you'd strip off your clothes and join him," Amy said.  
  
"I wouldn't do that," the Doctor protested.  
  
"Yes, you would, sweetie," River said.  
  
"No one asked you," the Doctor said while Amy and River shared a high five.  
  
"Okay," Lori said, coming up the stairs. "It's ready."  
  
"Um…your son is being an exhibitionist up here," Amy said to her.  
  
"Did he pull his pants off in front of you?" Lori said, turning and looking up at them from the stairs as they looked over the partition.  
  
"Yes and he's watching telly that way now," Rory said.  
  
"Arrrgh!" Lori said, turning around and heading the rest of the way up. "I'm sorry; we're trying to get him to stop that. He likes to show off his penis and touch others inappropriately. He's five so he's fascinated by groins at the moment."  
  
"No harm done, it's just childlike curiosity," the Doctor said as Lori came into the hallway and turned to go into the lounge.  
  
The Doctor followed her when she went into the lounge. Tom tried to get away from her when Lori snatched up his clothes and tried to go to him but the Doctor grabbed him and held him while she forced her son to put his clothes back on. Tom gave the Doctor an indignant look and tried to squirm out his grasp but the Doctor held him immobile until his pants and pajama bottoms were back on.  
  
"There, now watch Spongebob and quit stripping for everyone in the house," she said, giving his bottom a swat. "Thank you, Doctor."  
  
"My pleasure," the Doctor said, letting go of Tom.  
  
Tom gave him one more dirty look before he plopped back down in front of the TV.  
  
"I'm sure he'll be an exhibitionist tomorrow so be prepared," Lori said to them. "Anyway, Jim will look after him and everyone else so follow me."  
  
They walked back to the stairs and went downstairs. While they were walking down, Amy got a funny feeling. She looked to her left and saw the den and a doorway with a glassless window and a wooden counter near the back of the room. She swore something was watching her from the darkened room.  
  
"What is that room, Lori?" she said, pointing to it.  
  
Lori stopped on the stairway and looked where she was pointing.  
  
"That was a project that was started by my husband and his father when they built this house for us," she said. "It's supposed to be like a bar but they never finished it and there's a bathroom back there, they never finished and at the back of the room is a door that leads to a storage room. Why?"  
  
"I got this creepy feeling coming down," Amy said. "Like something is back there watching me."  
  
"Thank you," Lori said.  
  
"I'm sorry?" Amy said.  
  
"I have the same feeling but Jim swears it's my imagination. The children don't like it either. They run up the stairs to get away from that room and I don't like being down here either. This was all open land before they built here and I think there's something here. But don't tell Jim that because he'll argue with you. But thank you for validating me, at least someone can feel it too."  
  
"Can you feel it?" Amy asked her family.  
  
The Doctor, Rory and River looked at the room. They shook their heads.  
  
"Doesn't mean something isn't there," the Doctor said. "Some people are more sensitive to vibrations and pick them up more easily."  
  
"Whatever you say, it just feels creepy down here," Amy said.  
  
They went down the stairs. In front of the stairs was a wooden door to a closet and to their right was another door that led out to the garage. The air smelled like car exhaust while they walked to Lori's cobalt blue Chevy Nova. The Doctor got in the passenger side while the others got into the back. Lori got in and asked everyone to put their seatbelts on.  
  
"It snowed yesterday and I haven't been out since then. I don't know how treacherous the roads are right now," she said, buckling her seatbelt after shutting her door.  
  
She slowly backed the car out before hitting a button on the remote clipped to the visor above her head. The door went down in front of them while she slowly turned the car and positioned herself on the back of the driveway. She cursed slightly while the car struggled to get through the snow at the back before she finally found the rut made by the truck and she was able to drive more easily. The Doctor relaxed while she turned her car to the right at the end of the driveway and drove back the way they came.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	6. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116125) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116125)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=6) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Six  
  
"Here you go," Lori said as she drove down the country road. "Now you can look at Indiana from the comfort of a car and not have to trudge through the snow."  
  
"Not much to look at," Amy said while they looked out the windows at barren, snowy fields, trees and cows.  
  
"And that's why we wondered why you'd pick this place to take a hike through," Lori said, looking over her shoulder at her. "Not the most fascinating place on Earth."  
  
"Yes, but it looks quite peaceful," the Doctor said.  
  
"Yeah, peaceful to the point of boredom," Lori joked.  
  
They went down a hill and they looked at a farm just off the road. More cows grazed in a field beside it and there were a couple of brick houses on either side of the road just up from it. Beyond that was a small bridge and Lori slowed down slightly while going across it. Then they went up another hill and stopped a few feet beyond that. They drove down snowy country roads that had occasional houses in between the fields. She turned again and headed towards a bend in the road. Snow covered trees lined the road and there was a deep ditch on either side of it. Lori chatted with her new friends while she headed towards the curve in the road. Suddenly, without warning, a young doe leapt out of the woods, went across the ditch and up a short incline to the road. Lori gasped and everyone tensed while she slammed on the brakes. It wasn't enough to stop and they all gasped again when the passenger side of the car hit the deer's rump and she went head over heels into the ditch.  
  
"Oh God, I didn't mean to hit it," Lori said while the Doctor got out of the car.  
  
Amy rolled down her window and stuck her head out while the Doctor walked to the edge of the road. The deer was in the ditch, alive but stunned and he watched her struggle to her feet.  
  
"Come on, girl, get up," the Doctor said while he watched the deer test her back legs. "You can do it."  
  
He breathed a sigh of relief when the deer finally got to her feet. It stood a moment, looking at the Doctor out of the corner of her eye before it leapt up the incline and sprinted back into the woods.  
  
"She looks okay," Amy said from the car.  
  
"I think she is, just stunned her for a moment," the Doctor said. "I think it frightened her more than anything."  
  
He walked to the front of the car, put his hand on the hood and bent over to check for damage. He shook his head and got back inside the car.  
  
"I think the deer is alright," the Doctor said, shutting his door while Amy rolled up her window. "And there's no damage to the car that I can see."  
  
"I'm glad, on both counts," Lori said. "I hate hitting animals, makes me feel bad and I'm glad she lived. But those deer are a menace around here," she added as she drove off. "They used to be scarce around here but they allowed them to breed and overpopulate and now you have to be careful because they can jump out from anywhere."  
  
She slowed her speed the rest of the way. When they finally reached the city, she went slowly down a large hill and the Doctor noticed a sign off to his right welcoming them to New Castle. From the hill he could tell the city was small. Not a lot of people were out and they were able to drive to Marsh Supermarket in about five minutes. Lori pulled into a parking space near the large brick building and everyone got up.  
  
"I was thinking about hamburgers and French fries for tonight," she said to them. "Just keep it simple. And get some essentials in case we get more snow. Look," she said, pointing up at the dark grey sky. "I think it's coming. It's a good thing you found our house. You better get some food for yourselves in case it snows heavily and you can't get back to your car. As you can see, we have more than enough space and you're more than welcome to stay with us."  
  
"Thank you," the Doctor said. "And don't worry about paying for us, I have money. In fact, let me take care of the grocery bill as thanks for inviting us in."  
  
"Are you sure?" Lori said. "You don't have to."  
  
"No, you need to save your money for you and your family. I insist," the Doctor said, holding up his hand.  
  
"Thank you," Lori said. "I'll get the essentials and the stuff for supper. You get a little extra food for yourself and I'll meet you up by the cash registers."  
  
The Doctor nodded. Amy waited until they got inside and they grabbed a shopping trolley after Lori did. Lori pointed up to the registers and told them to take their time since she needed to get several things. Once she was gone, Amy nudged the Doctor.  
  
"Okay, where did you get the money then?" she said to him as they walked towards the aisles. "You never carry money."  
  
"True. But I had the TARDIS make some for me. I was always going to offer a bit of money to whoever we ran into as thanks for inviting us in."  
  
"Hey!" Rory said, grabbing the Doctor's arm.  
  
He stopped and gave him a quizzical look and Rory pointed to a sign on the wall by the cash registers. The sign was near a small bank and it said START AN ACCOUNT WITH US AND RING IN 2014 WITH MONEY IN THE BANK.  
  
"It's 2013 then," Rory said to them.  
  
"Good eye," the Doctor said. "So we're in New Castle, Indiana on the day before Thanksgiving, 2013. And we learned all that without asking."  
  
"We asked the cows," Amy said. "Course they said this was Corntopia."  
  
"Perhaps Corntopia referred to their field," the Doctor said while they walked on. "So…what sort of nibbles do we want?"  
  
"Crisps," Amy said. "And pop."  
  
"Popcorn," Rory added.  
  
"River, what about you?" the Doctor said.  
  
"Well, since you're paying for it all, I'd like filet mignon, lobster tail, some caviar; the best steak money can buy."  
  
"Popcorn it is then," the Doctor said while his companions giggled.  
  
They found the aisle containing bags of crisps and soda. They slowed down and the Doctor stayed with the trolley while everyone else fanned out to look at the selections. The Doctor picked up a bag of cheese popcorn and examined it for a moment before putting it back. He felt someone touch his arm and smiled when River came up to him with a bag of generic crisps.  
  
"Contrary to what I was saying earlier, I thought I'd get the supermarket brand of crisps so you'll save money," she said to him as she put it in the trolley.  
  
"I have about 500 American dollars on my person, I think I could afford more than the generic brand of crisps," the Doctor said.  
  
"Wanna say that louder?" Amy said over her shoulder. "I don't think the thieves in here heard ya."  
  
The Doctor stared at her a moment before propelling his trolley towards her. Amy yelled and ran away while the Doctor stopped the trolley and snickered.  
  
"I'll get you for that," Amy said, shaking her fist at that.  
  
"Yeah, I'm trembling, Amelia, truly I am," the Doctor said, leaning on the handle of the trolley. "Who needs Daleks when you're around menacing the universe."  
  
Amy hurried out of the aisle and the Doctor snorted.  
  
"See, I make people tremble in their shoes," he said to River. "They flee in fear of me."  
  
"Of course, dear," River said condescendingly, patting his arm.  
  
"Don't you have nibbles to find?" the Doctor said to her.  
  
He looked around when Rory put a bag of pretzels in the trolley. He grinned and snatched the bag up.  
  
"Pretzels? Are we in a pub then?" he said, waving the bag in Rory's face.  
  
"No, because there's no lager in the trolley," Rory said, playfully snatching the bag away from him.  
  
"Alcohol, that's what we need," the Doctor said, slapping his forehead.  
  
"Yeah, just what we need, you drunk on Thanksgiving," River said dryly. "You're already immature enough without adding booze to the mix."  
  
Amy came back into the aisle with a large bottle of Glen Livet in her hand.  
  
"Funny you should say that, Melody," Amy said, putting the bottle in the trolley.  
  
"Take it back," the Doctor said, picking it up and handing it to her.  
  
"No, Lori said we could get anything we want so I'm getting this. This is my nibble," Amy said, pushing his hand back down into the trolley.  
  
"Fine, I'll drink it all and bash you on the head with the empty bottle," the Doctor said.  
  
Amy stuck her tongue out, took the bottle out and walked away while the Doctor looked at River and rolled his eyes. He looked at Rory when he put a 2 liter bottle of Coke in the trolley.  
  
"You're boring, you know that?" the Doctor said to him. "Predictable. Salty snacks and pop."  
  
"You're the one that just sent back the bottle of Glen Livet," Rory said with a shrug.  
  
"That wasn't in my budget," the Doctor said. "I don't mind getting Mad Dog 20/20 though."  
  
"Oh God, if you're drinking that, I'm going back through the snow to the TARDIS," River said. "I'm not gonna sleep beside you tonight if I'm covered in your vomit."  
  
"You mean at some point in your future, you're not covered in my vomit?" the Doctor teased.  
  
"No and that is most definitely a spoiler," River said while Rory chuckled.  
  
The Doctor looked at Amy when she came back around the corner carrying an enormous package of t-bone steaks.  
  
"My nibble," Amy said, putting it in the trolley.  
  
"Okay, we'll tie them to you and send you into the cougar cage, I'm sure Spot will enjoy them and you," the Doctor said.  
  
"Oh yeah, about that…thing in the cage. If you can talk to cows and dogs, you talk to that cougar and tell him not to kill us," Amy said, pointing to him.  
  
"I will if he gets out of the cage and comes after you," the Doctor said. "If he doesn't, I'm going to relax and enjoy turkey and not worry about it. Now take this back."  
  
"Yes, dad," Amy said sarcastically while she snatched the package up from the trolley.  
  
"I'm 907, I am most definitely old enough to be your father, grandfather, great grandfather, great great grandfather…"  
  
"Yeah, yeah," Amy said as she walked out of the aisle.  
  
"And hurry up, Lori doesn't want to be here all bloody night," the Doctor called to her.  
  
He leaned up from the trolley, walked over to the snacks and selected another bag of generic crisps and a Coke.  
  
"Crisps and a Coke, how boring and predictable," Rory said as he stood nearby.  
  
"Just trying to be like the apes I know," the Doctor said haughtily while he dumped them into the trolley.  
  
River walked over and selected a small glass jar of ranch chip dip and put that in the trolley. The Doctor picked it up and made a face while he looked at it.  
  
"Processed junk," he said as he put it back into the trolley.  
  
"Oh, and the Coke and crisps aren't?" River said.  
  
"They're less processed than that is," the Doctor said, pointing to the jar while River grabbed another bag of generic crisps and a bottle of Sprite.  
  
"There. I got Sprite just to be different," she said, putting the items into the cart.  
  
Amy came back around the corner and let a large hunk of cheese fall into the trolley.  
  
"There," she said.  
  
"This is what you're getting?" the Doctor said, picking up the cheese and showing it to her.  
  
"I like cheese," Amy said.  
  
"You better like constipation as well," the Doctor said, letting it drop back into the trolley.  
  
Amy stuck her tongue out. She grabbed a bag of cheese popcorn and another bottle of Coke and put them in the trolley.  
  
"So…if we get snowed in, we're living off crisps, pop and a large hunk of cheese," Rory said, looking in the trolley.  
  
"I have a remote control that can call the TARDIS to me. We can leave at any time," the Doctor said. "This is sufficient for snacking. Now…are we finished?"  
  
Everyone nodded.  
  
"Good, let's walk up to the front and look for Lori then," he said.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	7. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116127) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116127)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=7) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Seven  
  
After the Doctor gave Lori the money for everyone's groceries and she paid for it, they put the grocery bags in the trunk and got back in the car.  
  
"When we get home, I'm hoping you can meet my other two daughters," Lori said as she drove. "I have a nine and fifteen year old. The nine year old is named Michelle and the fifteen year old is Brittany. I wanted to warn you about Michelle though before you meet her."  
  
"Why? Is something wrong with her?" the Doctor said.  
  
"Well…yes and no. I mean there is technically something wrong with her but I don't see it that way. Michelle has Asperger's Syndrome. Very mild case but she's very shy, especially around strangers. But most people who have Asperger's have very high IQ and she does. Her IQ is 140."  
  
"Brilliant," the Doctor said, smiling.  
  
"Yes. We think so. We wanted to put her in a gifted school but we don't have the money but she's already skipped a grade. But that means some of the kids pick on her and tease her and she keeps to herself a lot. She loves to read though. She taught herself to read when she was three and books are her greatest love. You'll never see my daughter without a book nearby."  
  
"I love her already," the Doctor said. "I'm also an avid reader and I love intelligent people."  
  
"Well, you'll love her then," Lori said. "But I just wanted to warn you that she doesn't say much and she might seem a bit distant until she gets to know you but she does have a sense of humor. She just doesn't show it to everyone. She's very loving and friendly, just socially awkward in many ways."  
  
"So's this one," Amy said, poking the Doctor in the back of the head.  
  
Lori giggled when the Doctor tried to swat at her while Amy ducked.  
  
"Brittany's a normal teen girl which means she's moody and resents authority so beware of that too," Lori said to them. "But that's our family, take it or leave it. Of course, there are the inlaws who'll be here tomorrow so be sure to get plenty of rest because they're quite rowdy, among other things."  
  
XOXOXOXOXOXOXO  
  
When they got back home, Lori led them upstairs. She paused at the beginning of the long hallway. They heard Backstreet Boys coming from the room at the end of the hallway but now there was no laughter.  
  
"That's Michelle. Backstreet Boys are her favorite band," Lori said. "Follow me."  
  
Everyone walked behind her.  
  
"This is the bathroom," she said, pointing to the first room on the left. "Feel free to take a bath, shower or use the toilet. This," she said, pointing to the door immediately across from it, "is mine and Jim's bedroom. This door," she said, pointing to the door beside the bathroom, "is Tom's room and across the way is where Mandy sleeps."  
  
They looked in and saw Mandy sitting on the floor of her room playing with some Barbie Dolls. They waved at her and she waved back as they passed by.  
  
"And this," she said, pointing to the room to the left of the end room. "Is where Brittany sleeps."  
  
They looked inside and saw a girl laying on a white daybed by a window, she had long dark hair like her mother that cascaded down her back. She was on her stomach reading a book and looked up when everyone walked in. She gave a confused look to her mother and pointed to the strangers.  
  
"These are guests for Thanksgiving," Lori said to her. "This is the Doctor, his wife, River and their friends, Amy and Rory. They're from England."  
  
"Cool," Brittany said.  
  
"Everyone, this is my daughter, Brittany," Lori said.  
  
"Hi," Brittany said, waving, while they waved back. "So, can you say something British? I love British accents. I think they're cool."  
  
"Oh, um…" the Doctor said before walking over to her. "Wotcha, mate, I notice you're having a dekko at a book. What's the book called?"  
  
"Hunger Games," Brittany said, holding it up to him.  
  
"Brilliant. That book is wizard."  
  
Brittany laughed.  
  
"I like your accent," she said.  
  
"Cheers," the Doctor said with a bow. "Pleasure to meet you."  
  
"And you," Brittany said, shaking his hand.  
  
"Cheerio then," the Doctor said, waving while he walked back to his family.  
  
"We're having hamburgers tonight," Lori said to her while everyone went out.  
  
"Okay, mom," Brittany said before turning her attention back to her book.  
  
Lori stopped them a moment before looking into Michelle's room.  
  
"Honey, we have guests and they want to meet you, is that okay?" she said.  
  
"Yes," a soft voice replied.  
  
Lori nodded and they went inside. What caught the Doctor's attention first were the two large wooden bookcases by her cupboard. They were filled up with books. And there was another smaller bookcase by her pink daybed, also filled with books. Michelle was resting in a Spongebob beanbag by the bed, reading a book. She looked at the newcomers with wide eyes and sat her book down on her lap while her mother came over to her.  
  
"Honey, this is the Doctor, River, Amy and Rory. They're staying for Thanksgiving," she said. "This is Michelle."  
  
Everyone waved to her and Michelle waved shyly.  
  
"You love books?" the Doctor said gently to her.  
  
Michelle nodded.  
  
"What are you reading?" the Doctor said, pointing to the book in her hands.  
  
Michelle held it up. On the cover was a picture of Saturn and above it was TIME/LIFE WONDERS OF THE UNIVERSE. The book was a heavy hardback book and very thick. The Doctor glanced at his family and began to slowly walk towards her.  
  
"Can I see what you're looking at?" he said to her.  
  
Michelle nodded and he walked over to her side and bent over slightly.  
  
"Ah, the planet Venus," the Doctor said, looking at the photo of it. "Very lovely planet. Do you like books about outer space?"  
  
Michelle nodded.  
  
"I do too," the Doctor said.  
  
"I love to read," Michelle said softly.  
  
"Me too. It's wonderful."  
  
Michelle nodded and smiled.  
  
"Where are you from?" she said softly.  
  
"London, England," the Doctor said.  
  
He watched while Michelle picked up a purple satin bookmark and marked her place with it before closing the book. She got up and walked to the bookcase nearest the cupboard. She looked over her books before selecting another heavy hardback one. She held it up and showed it to everyone.  
  
"Ooo, Visual Guide to London," the Doctor said. "So you're quite knowledgeable about London then?"  
  
"The Queen lives in Buckingham Palace," Michelle said softly. "It's in Westminster."  
  
"Wow, she is brilliant," Amy said while Michelle gave everyone a proud smile.  
  
Michelle took the book to the Doctor and he thanked her while he took it from her.  
  
"I would like to be friends, Michelle. I hope we can be good friends with you, all of us," the Doctor said to her.  
  
"Honey, you wanna come help us put away the groceries?" Lori asked.  
  
Michelle nodded. She picked up the book she'd been reading and the Doctor smiled when she held it close to her body while she followed everyone out the door.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	8. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116146) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116146)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=8) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Eight  
  
Michelle helped Amy unload her grocery sack and put things away. What amused her was Michelle had put her book on the counter and was never far away from it while she helped. When they were finished, Michelle grabbed her book and headed out of the room.  
  
"You guys relax," Lori said. "I can get supper. You've done enough already. In fact, Jim probably has your beds ready if you want to go downstairs. I'll call you when supper's ready."  
  
They thanked her and headed out of the room. As they passed by the bay window, they noticed Tom and Mandy were outside romping in the snow with Rex. They stopped to look at them and noticed that Jim was over by the cougar cage putting a blue tarp over the top and three of the sides. The cougar was out of its house, watching him while he worked. The cougar was nearly the size of Rex.  
  
"Like I said," Amy said. "I hope that thing doesn't get out and kill us."  
  
They turned and headed downstairs. As they were going down, Amy got the odd feeling again about the unfinished room and shivered a bit at the creepiness of it. They paused on the stairs when they saw a wooden door opening below the stairs. They watched while Michelle came out of it, book in hand and headed for the unfinished room. She turned on a light and went into the bathroom and shut the door.  
  
"Apparently, the toilet works, unless she pees on the floor in there," the Doctor said as they went the rest of the way down. "See, Pond, there's nothing in there that I can see," he added as they stepped off the stairs.  
  
"Still creeps me out though," Amy muttered.  
  
The Doctor turned and walked to the open door under the stairs. There was a larger one beside it and when the Doctor bent down and peeked in, he saw a blue beanbag and a black and yellow one and another bookcase filled with books and some toys scattered about the tiny room.  
  
"Must be her secret clubhouse then," the Doctor said as the others peered in. "And more books. Blimey, Lori wasn't joking about her love of books. I like her more and more."  
  
They heard the toilet flush and turned around. Michelle opened the door, stepped out and paused at the doorway to the room when she saw them gathered around the door.  
  
"Hi," Rory said. "We're just peeking in at your hidey-hole here."  
  
"I read in there," Michelle said as she walked towards them.  
  
"You read everywhere, don't you?" the Doctor said.  
  
Michelle nodded. They stepped aside and she walked into the room, turned and beckoned them inside. They lowered their heads and stepped into the small room under the stairs.  
  
"Have you read Harry Potter?" Amy asked Michelle.  
  
Michelle nodded.  
  
"This is like Harry's room under the stairs," Amy said.  
  
Michelle grinned and nodded.  
  
"Are you still reading the outer space book then?" the Doctor said, bending over when she sat down in the blue beanbag.  
  
"Yes," Michelle said, showing him the book.  
  
"You know what I said about Venus?" the Doctor said in a loud whisper. "I lied. It's a rubbish planet. All cloudy and hot and the people are annoying. I hate it."  
  
He smiled when Michelle giggled at that.  
  
"Well, we're going to go check out our beds so happy reading, my little friend," the Doctor said to her.  
  
He was hoping that Michelle would follow as everyone went outside. He liked the little girl immensely. She was intelligent and sweet and loving and he wished she was a bit older so he could take her on adventures and show her the real universe. The Doctor went out last and made an "Oh no!" face as he slowly closed the door. Michelle giggled and he shut the door and turned to see that past the unfinished room was a wider part of the den.  
  
The fold out sofa had been pulled out so it was one big bed and a fitted sheet had been put over it and pillows, sheets and blankets put on it. Beside it were two black sleeping bags with pillows and beside the sofa were two blue recliners. Jim had built a fire in the brick fireplace and they heard the wood snap and crackle. The fireplace was mounted in the wall about a third of the way up and a brick ledge ran under it to both sides of the wall. Above it, a wood mantle also ran from one wall to the other. The TV was off to the side of the fireplace on the brick ledge and there was a DVD player on top and a selection of DVDs to the side of the TV. On the far right wall was a huge window that looked out onto the brick patio and a patio door beside it. To the left of that was built in bookcases filled with books and beside that was a wooden door. The Doctor walked over to the closed door, opened it and looked in.  
  
"Laundry room," he said, closing it.  
  
He turned and grinned when he saw the door under the stairs was open and Michelle was standing beside it, watching them silently while she held her book against her. River caught his eye and winked before she walked over to the TV.  
  
"Wow," she said aloud while Michelle watched, "this is a really nice TV and there's some films here for us to watch. It would be nice to have some company while we watch them."  
  
The Doctor chuckled when Michelle hurried back into her room. She came out a moment later, dragging her beanbag with one hand while holding her book with the other.  
  
"Yay, we're going to have a guest for films!" the Doctor said while Michelle dragged her beanbag to the sleeping bags and dropped it. "You choose the DVD then, little friend."  
  
Michelle put her book in her beanbag and walked over to the DVDs.  
  
"D'ya see that, she let go of the book," Rory said to his family with wide eyes.  
  
"That was brave of her, we could take it now if we wanted to," Amy teased while Michelle let out a soft giggle.  
  
"Shall I then?" the Doctor said, making a big show of prancing over towards the beanbag.  
  
"No," Michelle said then giggled when the Doctor froze with a deer in the headlights look by the beanbag.  
  
"She spotted me, what do I do?" he said to his family while Michelle giggled and watched.  
  
"I'll take care of this, sweetie," River said.  
  
She walked over to Michelle, paused a moment and then let out a gasp as she pointed up the stairs.  
  
"A monster, look!" she said.  
  
Michelle looked quickly and then looked back to see the Doctor picking up her book. She laughed when he froze again with the deer in the headlights look and walked over to him.  
  
"Um…I was just…keeping this safe for you, honestly," the Doctor said while Michelle giggled. "Hey, have you read all those books?" he said, pointing to the bookcases behind him.  
  
Michelle nodded.  
  
"Have you read every book in the house?" the Doctor asked.  
  
Michelle nodded.  
  
"Have you read every book on planet Earth?"  
  
Michelle nodded and giggled when the Doctor's eyes grew wide.  
  
"Wow, you've been busy in your nine short years," he said while his family chuckled. "So if you've read everything there is, why are you so afraid of me taking your book away?"  
  
"Because I like it," Michelle said.  
  
"But you've read it. You said you read everything on the planet so why can't I have it?" the Doctor said, his eyes twinkling.  
  
"Because I wanna read it again," Michelle said.  
  
"Oooh, so it's that sort of thing, is it? Nothing to read that's new so you gotta start over? Well, I'll leave this here so you can reread it then," he said, putting the book back in the beanbag.  
  
"I'll get you a book to read," Michelle said before walking back to the bookcases.  
  
She selected a hardcover book with a white dust jacket from the shelves and brought it back to the Doctor. The Doctor took it and his eyes boggled when he read the title.  
  
"The Illustrated Guide to Sex? You read this as well?" he said in a high-pitched voice while his family laughed. "Seriously?"  
  
"Mandy found that in Mommy and Daddy's room one day," Michelle said.  
  
"And you read it?"  
  
His family laughed when she nodded.  
  
"You know, there is such a thing as too much education," the Doctor said. "But here, Pond, get some tips on your love life," he said, throwing the book to her. "And you, thanks but I don't need any book about sex. I know enough already."  
  
"Ha, that's a laugh," River muttered.  
  
"Buuuut," the Doctor said, choosing to ignore that while Amy opened the book and perused it, "whatcha wanna watch, my little friend?"  
  
Michelle walked over to the stack of DVDs and selected a purple case halfway down the stack. She pulled it out and brought it over to the Doctor.  
  
"Barney Goes to the Zoo? Barney the Dinosaur?" the Doctor said while Michelle giggled. "Oh, for shame. I thought you were supersmart. You watch Barney?"  
  
"Mandy does," Michelle said.  
  
She giggled when the Doctor bopped her on the head with the case.  
  
"Well, Mandy can watch this on her own time. You choose something for us that doesn't involve big purple annoying dinosaurs."  
  
Michelle took it back and selected another DVD. She brought it back to the Doctor.  
  
"Ah, Lord of the Rings, Return of the King, much better. Have you read Lord of the Rings then?"  
  
Michelle shook her head.  
  
"NO?" the Doctor said while she giggled.  
  
She laughed harder when he staggered back, feigned horror on his face while River rushed to catch him.  
  
"You, the book lover, have never read the Lord of the Rings? You lied to me when you said you read every book on Earth?" he said while Michelle laughed harder. "You lied to your friend? And…you read books on London but not Lord of the Rings? What's wrong with you? We need to get you the entire set of Tolkien's books then. That's blasphemy. Someone like you never reading Lord of the Rings before."  
  
"I'm sorry," Michelle said.  
  
The Doctor chuckled and gave her a playful swat on the head with the DVD case.  
  
"You're forgiven but don't let me catch you slacking off in your reading again," he said before he opened the case and put the DVD in the player.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	9. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116147) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116147)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=9) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Nine  
  
The Doctor grinned. He and River were lying together on the sofabed while Amy and Rory lay on the sleeping bags in front of them. He was watching the movie but at the same time he was observing Michelle. She started out giving her complete attention to the film but after a half hour, she opened up her book again and divided her time between reading it and watching the TV. He nudged his wife and pointed to her.  
  
"She reads more than you do," River murmured to him.  
  
"I know. It's refreshing to meet a fellow book lover, especially since Pond only reads the backs of cereal boxes," he said, raising his voice for the last part.  
  
"That's because you hog all the books," Amy said loudly while Michelle giggled.  
  
"No, I keep them safe so you don't tear them up," the Doctor said.  
  
He looked at Michelle who was still reading.  
  
"Give us the precious book, we wants it," he said to her as he imitated Gollum.  
  
Michelle giggled again and then fell silent while she read. Then after twenty minutes, she marked her place and closed her book.  
  
"Can I ask you something?" she said to the Doctor.  
  
"Sure. Although, you read every book on Planet Earth so you probably know more than I do," the Doctor teased. "What do you want to ask me?"  
  
"Do you like me?"  
  
The Doctor blinked in surprise.  
  
"Do I like you? Isn't that obvious?" he said while his family chuckled. "Yes, I like you. Do you like me?"  
  
Michelle nodded and smiled.  
  
"Well, why are you worried I don't like you?"  
  
"Because I don't have any friends."  
  
The Doctor raised his head up and stared at her while his family looked at each other.  
  
"No friends?" he said. "But you're sweet and kind and intelligent."  
  
"I'm too brainy, people say so," Michelle said, staring at the floor.  
  
"Oh blimey, this is one thing I do not like about humans," the Doctor muttered as he rolled his eyes. "Do you get made fun of in school?"  
  
Michelle nodded and Amy stood up, sat down beside her and rubbed her back while she continued to stare at the floor.  
  
"Look, those people, they're idiots. They can't see how wonderful you are," Amy said. "A lot of people pick on smart people because they're intimidated by how smart they are. We like you. If we didn't, we wouldn't have called you over here to watch the film with us."  
  
Michelle smiled and Amy wrapped her arm around her and hugged her tightly.  
  
"We like smart people so you can be our friend," Amy said to her, rubbing her arm while Michelle sniffed and wiped a tear from her face.  
  
The others got up and got around her, hugging and rubbing her while Amy kissed her wet cheek.  
  
"I don't want people coming over for Thanksgiving because some of them make fun of me too," Michelle said to them.  
  
"Who makes fun of you?" the Doctor said angrily. "What do they say?"  
  
"They tell me to stop reading so much and go out and play with other people because I'm too nerdy," Michelle said.  
  
"Oh, how charming," River muttered. "Telling a little girl that."  
  
"Michelle, you do what you want to do with your life," the Doctor said to her. "You wanna sit on your bum all day and read to your heart's content, do it! Be the smart girl. Don't lower yourself down to other people's level because they don't like that you're smarter than they are. Be proud of who you are, yeah?  
  
Michelle nodded and sniffed while Amy kissed another tear off her cheek.  
  
"You feel threatened tomorrow or someone says something, you come and find us. We'll stick up for you," the Doctor said. "No one has the right to tell you to stop being intelligent. You like to read, do it! Who cares what they think. You're gonna be a sensation one day, Michelle, and I bet they know that too. They're just afraid you're gonna outshine them."  
  
"Thank you for being my friend," Michelle said.  
  
"Your family doesn't tease you about being smart, do they?" Rory said.  
  
"No. Mommy and Daddy love me. It's my stupid aunts and uncles and cousins that do it."  
  
"Well, you have four people in your corner now so you can rely on us," the Doctor said. "Just chill with us tomorrow, we'll have fun all on our own without your aunts and uncles and cousins."  
  
"Does your mommy and daddy know what your aunts and uncles and cousins say?" Amy said.  
  
"Yeah. But they don't listen when Mommy and Daddy tell them to shut up and they come over because they get angry if they don't get invited so I go and hide from them. I do it on Christmas too."  
  
"Well, you can keep close to us tomorrow if you want," River said.  
  
"Thank you," Michelle said.  
  
"Can you keep a secret?" the Doctor said to her.  
  
Michelle nodded.  
  
"A big secret that's just between all of us and no one else?"  
  
Michelle smiled and nodded.  
  
"Okay," the Doctor said, lowering his voice, "this is my secret. I'm a space alien and I travel through time and space in a magic box and my wife and friends travel with me and we see everything that's in this book here," he said, tapping her book. "That's my secret so shhhh…"  
  
"Is he for real?" Michelle said to Amy.  
  
Amy nodded emphatically.  
  
"Are you an alien?"  
  
"No, we're all human like you but he's an alien," Amy said. "He's telling you the truth."  
  
"And you fly in a spaceship?" Michelle said to the Doctor.  
  
"Yup, a very special spaceship that goes through time and takes me to anywhere in the universe I want."  
  
"I wanna go then," Michelle said.  
  
The Doctor put his hand on her head.  
  
"I wish I could take you but you're too young," the Doctor said. "See, it's very dangerous sometimes and you have to be a grownup so you can face the danger. I met Amy when she was seven and she had to wait fourteen years until she could go with me."  
  
"Will you take me when I'm a grownup?" Michelle said.  
  
The Doctor and his family shared glances.  
  
"Well…I look for intelligent people and you have that in overflow. I like compassionate, loving people and you fit that description and I like people with a bit of an adventurous side. Now…that we might have to work on since you seem to like to sit on your bum and read but that's easily fixed. What you need is some stimulation, something more than just a book so I think you could easily be adventurous if given the chance. So yes, I'll definitely keep you in mind for my traveling companion when you're old enough."  
  
Everyone smiled when she hugged him. The Doctor wrapped his arms around her and hugged her tightly.  
  
"Speaking of stimulation," the Doctor said while he held her in his arms. "Do you like playing in the snow?"  
  
Michelle nodded.  
  
"Do you like building snowmen and making snow angels?"  
  
Michelle nodded.  
  
"How many times have you seen this film?" the Doctor said, pointing to the TV.  
  
"Lots of times."  
  
"I see. So…since you probably know the film by heart now, let's go out and have some fun before dinner. What do you think about that?"  
  
"I like that."  
  
The Doctor grinned and held her close, kissing her cheek.  
  
"Come on then, let's get our winter gear on and have a bit of fun outside," he said to her.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	10. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116191) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116191)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=10) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Ten  
  
Michelle walked to her room, elated that she had real friends that really liked her for who she was. And she knew a big secret that no one else knew and it made her feel important. She didn't want to disappoint the Doctor so she made up her mind to never tell anyone he was a space alien.  
  
As she passed by Brittany's room, she stopped and wandered in. Brittany was still reading and she put down her book and smiled at her sister.  
  
"Hey, Creepy, whatcha doing?" she said fondly.  
  
"I got friends, Sissy. Doctor and River and Amy and Rory, they wanna be my friends and they're gonna play outside with me," she squealed.  
  
"Yay! I'm glad you found friends, you need some," Brittany said, sitting up and tousling her hair. "You need to find other people besides us to hang around with."  
  
"I'm glad they came, they're gonna stick up for me if anyone says anything to me tomorrow too," Michelle said.  
  
"Good."  
  
"Well, gotta go get my coat and stuff on so I can build a snowman. See ya!" Michelle said, walking out of the room.  
  
"Bye, Creepy, don't give them your cooties!" Brittany yelled as she went out the door.  
  
"You give people cooties!" Michelle yelled back.  
  
"Nah, you do!" Brittany called out.  
  
"You!" Michelle said from inside her room.  
  
She heard her sister giggling and she smiled while she got up from the bed and went to find her mother. She found her cooking dinner in the kitchen. Lori smiled when she walked inside.  
  
"Mom, where did you find these people?" Brittany said, sitting on one of the bar stools. "The Doctor and the others, I mean."  
  
"Dad found them walking up the road and they said they wanted to eat Thanksgiving somewhere. Why?"  
  
"Shelly is happy now because they told her they'd be her friends and they're going outside with her to play in the snow."  
  
Lori beamed.  
  
"I'm glad. They're nice people, I can tell. It'll be nice for Shelly to have someone to talk to."  
  
"Shelly also said that they said they'd stick up for her tomorrow if people started being assholes to her," Brittany said.  
  
Lori sighed while she opened the fridge.  
  
"I told them about your family and how they are," she said while she rummaged in the fridge. "I warned them they might get a bit rowdy. I hate for them to be embarrassed by their behavior but I'm glad they're willing to look out for Shelly and tell them to back off if they say anything."  
  
Brittany nodded. She smiled when Michelle came into the room dressed in a pink coat with matching pink hat, gloves and rubber books.  
  
"I'm going to go outside and play with the Doctor and Rory and Amy and River," she said, walking over to her mother.  
  
"I'm glad, honey. Brit said they want to be your friends now."  
  
Michelle beamed and nodded. Lori kissed her cheek and told her to have fun. She watched lovingly while her daughter hurried out of the room.  
  
"Yes, I think it was a good idea for your father to bring those four here for Thanksgiving," Lori said to her daughter when Michelle was out of earshot.  
  
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO  
  
"There she is!" the Doctor said when Michelle opened the door and stepped outside. "I thought the siren call of her book was too strong for her to resist."  
  
"I told Mommy that I was coming out here but I didn't tell her what you said to me," Michelle said, walking down the porch steps.  
  
"See, Pond, she listens when I tell her not to do something," the Doctor said to Amy.  
  
Amy who was rolling a snowball in the snow flipped him off without looking behind her. Michelle looked at the steep hill that led down to the driveway and trundled over to the Doctor.  
  
"Be careful if you go over to that hill cause people slip and slide down it sometimes," she said.  
  
"Oh? Do you do that?" the Doctor said while he made a snowball.  
  
"No but daddy has and some of my stupid uncles got drunk and did it. It's funny cause they go zooming down the hill on their butts."  
  
"So…if I pick up Rory and fling him down the hill will you think it's funny?" the Doctor said.  
  
"No, cause Rory's my friend."  
  
"Thank you!" Rory said while Amy giggled. "Thank you, Michelle, for defending me."  
  
"You're welcome," Michelle said while she walked over to Rory.  
  
He and River were making the bottom half of the snowman. Michelle looked around and noticed his father, sister, brother and Rex were out in the middle of the field, walking and talking. Rex looked back and they heard him bark.  
  
"Reggie just said hello to us," the Doctor said as he built up his snowball in the snow.  
  
He glanced over when Spot came out of his house and walked over to a large blue bowl to get a drink.  
  
"Hey, Michelle, if I let Spot out and sicced him on Rory would you think that was funny?" the Doctor said to her.  
  
"No, Rory's my friend," Michelle said, patting some snow onto the Doctor's snowball.  
  
"Is this pick on Rory day or something?" Rory said to him.  
  
"Every day is pick on Rory day, my friend," the Doctor said over his shoulder. "Hey," he said in a loud whisper to Michelle. "You see the big nose on Rory's face. One time we were on this planet and he sneezed inside this city and knocked all the people out of it. We were all alone for hours while people walked miles and miles to get back home."  
  
River snicked along with Michelle while Rory eyed the Doctor. Rory grinned and walked up to the Doctor. He feigned a loud sneeze and the Doctor gasped and pretended to stumble. Michelle laughed when he pretended to tetter at the top of the hill before he waved his arms around and ran down it, yelling in pretend terror. The Doctor got to the bottom of the hill and plopped down in the snow.  
  
"Ow, Rory broke my bum, I can't stand now," the Doctor yelled while Michelle giggled.  
  
"For shame, Rory. That's the twentieth time you broke the Doctor's bum," Amy said to her husband.  
  
"Blame my nose, I don't know my own strength sometimes," he said, tapping the side of it while he walked back to River.  
  
River walked past him and walked over to Michelle. She winked at her little friend and took her hand before they walked down the hill to the Doctor who was still sitting in the snow.  
  
"Are you gravely injured, love?" River said sweetly when they stopped beside him.  
  
"My bum bone is broken," the Doctor whined while Michelle giggled. "Kiss it and make it better?"  
  
Michelle, Amy and Rory snickered while River raised her eyebrow. The Doctor gave her a devilish grin and pointed to his butt.  
  
"I'll kiss your cheeks but not those cheeks," River said, pointing to his butt.  
  
The Doctor pouted and then smiled when Michelle let go of River's hand and held her hand out to him.  
  
"Are you going to help me up then?" he said.  
  
Michelle nodded.  
  
"You're such a helpful little girl," the Doctor said, taking her hand and standing up. "Not like the ungrateful wenches who are married to one another and are too busy making a snowman to care about poor pitiful me down here."  
  
"Gee, suddenly I feel like opening Spot's cage and let the Doctor talk himself out of a mauling, you?" Amy said to her husband.  
  
"After having to listen to the nose remark, open it and let the cougar run, my wife," Rory said to her.  
  
"See, they don't like me," the Doctor said to Michelle.  
  
"Perhaps, my love, if you refrain from making fun of them, they might like you more," River said sweetly.  
  
"But then I'd be bored," the Doctor said to her.  
  
He grinned and patted Michelle on the head.  
  
"You like the Backstreet Boys?" he asked her.  
  
Michelle nodded. The Doctor cleared his throat and began to sing loudly.  
  
"You are my fire, the one desire, believe when I say, I WANT POND TO GO AWAY!" he bellowed while Michelle giggled.  
  
"That's it, cougar is coming out of the cage now," Amy said as she started walking towards the cage.  
  
She spun around when the cougar growled at her.  
  
"Ha ha," the Doctor said as he, River and Michelle walked back to his snowball. "See? No courage at all."  
  
"At least I'm not a git," Amy said.  
  
"What's a git?" Michelle said to the Doctor.  
  
"A very stupid person, case in point," the Doctor said, pointing to Amy before winking at his little friend.  
  
"See what he does, Michelle?" Amy said to her. "He takes people with him so he can insult him and act superior. So you better think long and hard before traveling with him."  
  
"Hey, Michelle?" the Doctor said to her.  
  
"You can call me Shelly if you want, my family does," Michelle said.  
  
"Ooo, okay, Shelly…Got a question for ya, better answer now. Am I original?" he crooned to her.  
  
"Yeeeah," Michelle sang back.  
  
"Am I the only one?" he sang to Michelle.  
  
"Yeeeah," Michelle sang back.  
  
He looked at River.  
  
"Am I sexual?" he sang to her.  
  
"Not in the least," River said.  
  
Michelle giggled when the Doctor glared at her. River smiled and patted his cheek.  
  
"Are you from Venus?" Michelle asked the Doctor.  
  
"No, I told you, Venus is a rubbish planet. Only rubbish people come from rubbish planets and I'm not a rubbish person."  
  
"Speak for yourself," Amy said while she and Rory lifted the second snowball onto the first.  
  
"Nope," the Doctor said, ignoring Amy. "I am from a planet called Gallifrey."  
  
Michelle frowned.  
  
"I don't know that one," she said.  
  
"Well, not many humans do. It's not widely known and now it's gone so people will probably never know about it."  
  
"Where'd it go?" Michelle said while she help him and River build the snowman's head.  
  
"It burned a long time ago," the Doctor said, patting more snow onto the head. "I'm the last of my kind."  
  
"No."  
  
The Doctor looked at Amy when she said that.  
  
"I beg your pardon?" he said.  
  
"River's half Time Lord, you're not the last anymore," she said to him.  
  
"What's a Time Lord?" Michelle said.  
  
"That's what I am and what River is…partly," the Doctor said.  
  
"Where's your spaceship?" Michelle said.  
  
"Way over there," the Doctor said, pointing back to the other road.  
  
"Um…is it blocking the road then? I saw E.T. and his ship was huge," Michelle said.  
  
"No, mine is very small. So small it can stay on the side of the road and not block traffic," the Doctor said.  
  
"Can I see it?" Michelle said.  
  
"Well, we'd have to walk back to it or get a ride and I don't think your mum and dad would approve of me taking you on a walk through the snow and they'd see my ship if they gave us a lift back to it."  
  
"What about that remote control you said you had," Amy said to him.  
  
"Yeah, bring it here so that way we don't have to walk all the way back when we leave here," Rory said. "Park it in the field."  
  
"What if someone sees it? There's windows on every side of the house, it would be a bit obvious," the Doctor said to them.  
  
"Tell mommy that you're an alien and you're good. She'd let you keep it here," Michelle said.  
  
The Doctor and his family shared a glance.  
  
"Dare I?" the Doctor said.  
  
Rory came up beside him.  
  
"If they take us back to the TARDIS, they'll see it," Rory said. "And they'd probably think it was odd if we asked to just ride to the end of this road," he added, pointing to the road.  
  
"If we talk to Lori, maybe she can let us hide the TARDIS in the laundry room," Amy said, coming up beside Rory. "No one will see it there."  
  
"River, what do you think?" the Doctor said.  
  
"She seems like a nice person and you haven't threatened her with a ray gun or gave her an anal probe. The worst that could happen is she could tell us to go and we walk back to the TARDIS," she said with a shrug.  
  
"Unless she calls someone and we find ourselves on a dissection table in the middle of Indiana," the Doctor said.  
  
"And if she threatens that, you use your remote control, call the TARDIS here and we get inside and go," Amy said.  
  
The Doctor looked at his family.  
  
"Will your mum understand?" he asked Michelle.  
  
"Do you have proof you're an alien?" Michelle asked.  
  
"I have two hearts and my TARDIS," the Doctor said. "I could offer those as proof."  
  
"We know about aliens cause there were some that came here a couple years ago," Michelle said. "Just say you're a good alien and I'll say it too. Cause you are," she said, patting his hand.  
  
"Well…I suppose we could try to convince her we aren't here to kill them," the Doctor said. "Okay, we'll go in and speak to your mum then and hope she understands we're only here to enjoy Thanksgiving with her."  
  
"Come on, she's in the kitchen," Michelle said, taking his hand.  
  
"Here goes nothing," the Doctor muttered to his family before they followed her up onto the porch.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	11. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116192) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116192)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=11) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Eleven  
  
Lori was in the kitchen by herself, preparing the turkey for baking when Michelle came in with the Doctor and his family.  
  
"Mommy," Michelle said.  
  
"Hey, having fun out in the snow?" Lori said, looking over her shoulder.  
  
"Mm-hmm, we're having lots of fun," Michelle said, nodding.  
  
"Thanks so much for being her friends," Lori said to them while she walked over to the sink and turned it on. "She needs friends badly."  
  
"And we're happy to be her friends," the Doctor said.  
  
"Mommy, Doctor's got something to tell you, a big secret," Michelle said.  
  
"Oh?" Lori said while she washed her hands.  
  
The Doctor glanced at his family before letting go of Michelle's hand.  
  
"Look, before I say this, we're not lunatics and we're not killers or anything like that," the Doctor said.  
  
Lori gave him an odd look while she wiped her hands on a dishtowel.  
  
"Why are you saying this?" she said. "Should I be afraid of you if that's what you're implying?"  
  
"No," the Doctor said. "But there's something different about me, different than the average human."  
  
"Okay," Lori said hesitantly.  
  
"Mommy, he's a space alien," Michelle said as she walked up to her mother. "He has a spaceship and he wants to park it in the laundry room so they can leave from here and nt have to walk back."  
  
Lori gave her daughter a wry grin.  
  
"Oh, really?" she said to her daughter. "So you're pretending to be a space alien because of the Time/Life book?" she said to the Doctor.  
  
"No, it's not pretend," the Doctor said.  
  
Lori stared at him.  
  
"You're an alien and yet, you look human," she said.  
  
"Yes, because there are several species of aliens that look human and I'm one of them," the Doctor said.  
  
Lori raised her eyebrow and the Doctor sensed he was losing her.  
  
"Look, I can prove it," the Doctor said.  
  
"Oh? Okay, prove it then," Lori said, folding her arms over her chest.  
  
"Well, I have a remote control that can call my ship to me but…perhaps the kitchen isn't the best place to land it. Could we go downstairs then?"  
  
"Please, mommy, just trust him," Michelle pleaded.  
  
Lori looked at her daughter and saw the pleading look on her face.  
  
"Okay, we'll go downstairs but I'm still not convinced," Lori said.  
  
The Doctor glanced at his family while Michelle took his hand. They followed Lori downstairs and Lori led them back to the storage room. She let them go past her and then shut the door.  
  
"Okay, spaceman, prove you're an alien," Lori said, staying by the door.  
  
The Doctor reached into his trouser pocket and pulled out a small silver box. He pushed a button on it and Lori waited. For a moment, nothing happened and Lori was about to tell him to stop this foolishness and leave. Then she heard a weird wheezing sound and her mouth dropped open when a blue box materialized behind the Doctor.  
  
"Wow, that's tiny," Michelle said, looking at it after it fully materialized.  
  
The Doctor smiled at Lori, patted Michelle on the head and clicked his fingers. The doors opened and Lori's eyes boggled when she saw the interior.  
  
"Whoa!" Michelle said, looking inside.  
  
The Doctor strolled inside and waved to everyone from the inside of the TARDIS. He smiled when Lori slowly walked towards it and then walked around the outside, rapping on the wood with her knuckles.  
  
"Come in," the Doctor said when she reached the front. "Both of you, there's nothing to be afraid of."  
  
Lori looked at her daughter and Michelle grinned and took her mother's hand. They walked inside and looked around.  
  
"Wow!" Michelle said gleefully.  
  
"Wow is an understatement, honey," Lori said.  
  
"Convinced now?" the Doctor said.  
  
"Yes, I mean unless you're some kind of supermagician," Lori said. "So why are you here then?"  
  
"To share Thanksgiving with you," the Doctor said. "I don't want to kill you, abduct you, do weird things to you. I'm a time traveler. This is my TARDIS and it takes me to any point in time and anywhere in the universe I wish to go. My wife and her parents travel with me. We go to different places and have adventures and occasionally fight evildoers and save people. I came up with the idea of finding someone we could share Thanksgiving with. I don't come to America as often as I'd like and I've never really had a Thanksgiving dinner. That's all we want, promise."  
  
"And are you aliens too?" Lori said to the others as they came inside.  
  
"No, we're human, except our daughter is half alien," Amy said. "He's a Time Lord and she's part Time Lord."  
  
"So…that stuff about Venus being a stupid planet, you meant that?" Lori said to the Doctor.  
  
The Doctor giggled.  
  
"Well, that was a bit of teasing but yes, I've been to Venus numerous times. Care to see it for yourself? I could take you for a quick trip as further proof. This is a time machine so I can bring you back two seconds after we leave."  
  
"Ooo, let's do it, Mommy!" Michelle squealed.  
  
"Um…you give your word that you're not going to hurt us?" Lori said warily.  
  
"I swear on my life and the lives of my family that I will not hurt either of you," the Doctor said, holding up his hand.  
  
Lori looked at her daughter.  
  
"Please, Mommy? They won't hurt us, they're friends," Michelle said, tugging on her hand.  
  
"Okay, if Shelly trusts you, I'll do the same," Lori said. "I suppose you could have done something to me when we were in my car so show us Venus then."  
  
"With pleasure," the Doctor said, bowing to them.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	12. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116198) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116198)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=12) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Twelve  
  
The Doctor asked Lori and Michelle to sit in the seats behind the console. Lori sat down and looked around hesitantly while Michelle plopped down in her seat, giddy with excitement. She watched while the Doctor and his family worked the console and hung on to the seat when the TARDIS went into the vortex. Two minutes later, the wheezing and shaking stopped and the ship stilled.  
  
"Okay, gotta explain to you that I'm going to open the front door and let you look out but don't go outside because you won't be able to breathe without spacesuits. The TARDIS will give us air so we'll be protected. Okay?"  
  
Lori nodded.  
  
"Did you hear that, Shelly?" the Doctor said. "Stay in here and don't go out the door."  
  
"I won't," Michelle said.  
  
"Okay, come with us and we'll show you Venus," the Doctor said.  
  
Lori took her daughter's hand and they headed down the stairs behind the others. The Doctor opened the door, peeked out and then pulled the doors back. Everyone stepped aside and let Lori and Michelle come up to the front. Lori's mouth dropped open when she looked out and saw a barren rocky surface and a sky that was completely clouded over. Rain was falling and when it hit the ground, it made a slight hissing sound while little wisps of clouds rose up.  
  
"See, rubbish planet," the Doctor said, pointing to the ground. "Ugly planet. The Venusians have to live underground because that rain there is sulfuric acid."  
  
"Are you serious?" Lori said.  
  
"Very serious," the Doctor said.  
  
"Are they hostile? The Venusians?" Lori said, putting her hands on Michelle's shoulders.  
  
"Not towards Earth," the Doctor said, shaking his hand. "They are a bit warlike but Earthlings are primitive to them and they don't see you as a threat. Besides, you lot are too busy fighting amongst yourselves to fight them."  
  
"Ain't that the truth," Lori said.  
  
"Now see, I could push you two out the door and let you suffocate to death but I'm just standing here letting you enjoy the view. I'm not a threat. In fact, I saved the Earth from real threats countless times. I protect your planet."  
  
Lori looked at his family and then nodded in agreement.  
  
"He's wonderful," Amy said. "A bit of a cheeky smartarse at times but he'd never hurt ya. We wouldn't travel with him if he was some sort of deranged monster."  
  
"But you're from Earth?" Lori said to Amy.  
  
"Rory and I are from Leadworth in England. Boring place," Amy said while Rory snorted and nodded. "River was conceived in here on our wedding night but she's part human."  
  
"But she's older than you are so how can you be her parents?" Lori said.  
  
"Wow, we're going to have a lot of explaining to do now," the Doctor said to his family. "Listen, how about a break from fixing dinner and we can go get a snack somewhere and talk. I will get you back safely, promise, but it's a long explanation and perhaps it's best if we went somewhere and talked."  
  
"Okay, well you haven't hurt us so far," Lori said. "What did you have in mind?"  
  
The Doctor sucked on his cheek while he thought. Then he grinned.  
  
"Shelly, wanna go see London?" he said to her.  
  
Michelle nodded her head rapidly.  
  
"How about some authentic English fish and chips. Sound good?" the Doctor said to Lori.  
  
"Actually, yes, that does sound good."  
  
"Great. Now the two of you can see something other than Indiana for a change," the Doctor said, closing the door.  
  
He told them to sit back down and Lori squeezed her daughter's hand while the Doctor gleefully inputted a destination for them.  
  
XOXOXOXOXOXOXO  
  
The TARDIS found a nice sunny day in London in June of 2013 and they landed within view of BuckinghamPalace. The Doctor pointed it out to Michelle as they stepped out of an alleyway and laughed when Michelle's eyes grew wide at the sight of it. They walked to a chippie and Amy and Rory brought everyone fish and chips and tea. They sat at a table near the back and ate while the Doctor gave a basic explanation of who he was, where he came from and what regeneration was and explained how it applied to River. Both Lori and Michelle were enthralled, both by the Doctor's tale and by the fact that there in London on a summer day eating fish and chips. Lori glanced at her daughter and noticed she was having the time of her life and realized that the Doctor was a good person and that he was a good friend for her daughter to have.  
  
"So that's kind of the basic overview of my life," the Doctor said when he finished his explanation. "We're just travelers, that's all. We like experiencing different things and meeting new people and we love your family and especially our new friend here," he said, reaching across and patting Michelle on the head. At first, we were going to keep it a secret from you but Shelly wanted you to know so we could bring our ship into your house."  
  
"Well, you can keep it in that storage room, no one ever goes back there," Lori said.  
  
"Thank you," the Doctor said.  
  
"What about Jim and the rest of the family? Immediate family, I mean. You don't wanna be telling the others you're an alien when they come in the morning," Lori said.  
  
"Well…" the Doctor said, looking at his family. "Would your husband freak out? I'm sure the children would understand but…"  
  
"We don't want the cougar after us," Amy said.  
  
Lori snorted.  
  
"Over my dead body," she said, rolling her eyes. "Actually, I told my husband to get rid of that thing. We have four children and I'm worried something might happen to them."  
  
"I was thinking the same thing," the Doctor said.  
  
"But his brother Billy got it for him and Jim doesn't want it but we have to figure out a way to get rid of it discreetly."  
  
"Well, the Doctor could take it into the TARDIS and take it off your hands," Rory said.  
  
"Yeah and take it to a zoo somewhere," Amy said.  
  
"Would you?" Lori said.  
  
"I'd be happy to and I could find it a good home in the wild," the Doctor said.  
  
"Then you are more than welcome at our house," Lori said while the others laughed. "As for Jim…I'm not sure. A few years ago, there was something about a flying bus and flying manta rays here in London?"  
  
The Doctor snickered.  
  
"Yup, that was me, I made the bus fly," he said. "The stingrays were aliens from another world that wanted to devour this one and turn it into a desert. I stopped that from happening."  
  
"We weren't with him when that happened," Amy said while Rory shook his head. "I was in Leadworth, dying of boredom at the time. See, I met him when I was seven and he told me he'd be back in five minutes and it ended up being twelve years later, which better not happen again when you take them back," she said, giving the Doctor a pointed look.  
  
"The TARDIS was damaged and wonky at the time, I can control it now," the Doctor said dismissively.  
  
He eyed his family when they gave each other pointed looks.  
  
"But I'm glad you accepted us," the Doctor said.  
  
"Well, thank you for befriending Michelle," Lori said.  
  
"My pleasure," the Doctor said, pinching Michelle's cheek. "She's a cutie."  
  
"Doctor said I could go with him and travel someday," Michelle said to Lori.  
  
"Oh?" Lori said with a grin while the Doctor's family sniggered and the Doctor blushed slightly.  
  
"Well, it's not a definite, yet," the Doctor said. "But she does have the makings of a good traveling companion so perhaps I'll keep her in mind."  
  
They finished off their meal with small talk before heading back to the TARDIS. When they were inside, the Doctor told them to wait a moment while he shut the front door. They watched while he bounded up the front steps and up the back steps and out of the room. He returned ten minutes later, holding a large leather bound book to his chest with one hand and carrying a tiny Perspex box in his other hand.  
  
"I thought perhaps as a show of good faith on my part, I would give you gifts," he said to Lori and Michelle. "Shelly, because you love books so much, I want to give you this very old book on the history of my planet for you to enjoy."  
  
"Ooo," Michelle said, taking it from him while Lori patted her shoulder.  
  
"You have to take good care of that, sweetie," Lori said to her.  
  
"I will, Mommy," Michelle said, holding the book close to her body.  
  
"And for you, I wish to give you a preserved leaf from Gallifrey," he said, handing the tiny box to her.  
  
Lori took it and her breath caught in her throat while Michelle stood on her tiptoes to look at it.  
  
"It's silver," Lori said, letting Michelle look at it.  
  
"Yes, we had silver leaves on some of our trees," the Doctor said.  
  
"But…no, I can't. This is from your home," Lori said.  
  
"And I have several preserved leaves, I'd like you to have this one as thanks for letting us be a part of your family for awhile."  
  
"If you have several, can I have one?" Amy said, leaning in.  
  
"No, because I broke my bum bone when I went down the hill and you did nothing to assist me so it's not a sausage for you, I'm afraid," the Doctor said.  
  
Michelle giggled when Amy blew a raspberry at him.  
  
"Now, let's go back to your house and relax," the Doctor said.  
  
Lori smiled and put her arm around her daughter while she held the book against her chest with one arm and examined the leaf in her other hand. Amy, Rory and River escorted them back to the seats and Lori and Michelle watched while the four of them took their new friends back home.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	13. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116200) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116200)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=13) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Thirteen  
  
"Oh thank God, you got back to the right time," Amy said when they stepped out of the TARDIS into the storage room.  
  
"Amy's a doubter at times, it's very annoying," the Doctor said to Lori while he closed the door.  
  
"Maybe because you told me five minutes and it turned out to be twelve years?" Amy said.  
  
"You're never gonna let me live that down, are you?" the Doctor said to her.  
  
"Nope," Amy said smugly.  
  
"I like your daughter better, Amy's become too annoying. I think I will take Michelle along with me," the Doctor said with a twinkle in his eye while Lori chuckled.  
  
They stepped out of the storage room and Lori shut the door firmly.  
  
"Since you're staying down here, you can keep an eye on it," Lori said to the Doctor. "But no one goes back there so I don't think anything will happen to your ship."  
  
"Even if someone did, it's nearly impossible to break into it," the Doctor said with a casual shrug. "Besides, to them it's just a box."  
  
"But I have some family members who'd be nutty enough to take a big blue box away from here so they could do something with it," Lori said.  
  
"Ah, but if they do, I just use my little remote control and call it back." The Doctor said, waggling his eyebrows. "So, no worries, Lori, nothing will happen to it that I can't deal with."  
  
"Mom?"  
  
They looked over when Brittany came down the stairs. She stopped halfway down and looked at them.  
  
"What's going on? I heard this weird noise like a wheezing, is the furnace acting up?"  
  
"Brit, can you do me a favor and keep a secret for me?" Lori said.  
  
"Keep a secret from who?" Brittany said, coming down the stairs.  
  
"I think she could be trusted," Lori said to the Doctor. "Actually, I'm sure even if my children told someone about you, they'd probably think it was some fanciful thing they thought up but I think for the moment we'll leave them and my husband in the dark."  
  
"Agreed," the Doctor said.  
  
"Keep them in the dark about what?" Brittany said, walking over towards them.  
  
"Brit, where's your father and sister and brother?" Lori said.  
  
"I think they're still out for a walk, why? What's this about?"  
  
"You have to promise me you'll keep this a secret from them for the moment. It's just between the people here, is that a promise?"  
  
"Okay," Brittany said, frowning while she looked at the Doctor.  
  
"We can go in my TARDIS, she can soundproof the interior so no one can hear us," the Doctor said to Lori.  
  
"TARDIS? What's that?" Brittany said.  
  
"Come with us, sweetie, the Doctor has something to show you," Lori said, beckoning to her.  
  
XOXOXOXOXOXOXO  
  
After a half hour of show and tell and another quick explanation, everyone emerged from the TARDIS. Brittany was just beginning to get over her shock as she left the timeship and she watched while the Doctor shut the doors.  
  
"Wow, I'm…" Brittany said, trying to find the right words. "This is incredible. But you said you were from London," she said to the Doctor.  
  
"I say that when I don't want people to know what I really am," the Doctor said. "I spent a fair amount of time in England and I picked up the speech and mannerisms of the British people over the years. But I'm from Gallifrey."  
  
"So, you promise not to tell your father or younger siblings for the moment?" Lori said to her.  
  
"Yeah, I promise. Wow, this is so cool," Brittany said, running her hand down the side of the TARDIS. "So…do you need to know anything?" she said to the Doctor.  
  
"Like what?" the Doctor said, frowning.  
  
"How to do certain things? How the world works, I mean you are from outer space. Do you need to learn how to do stuff?"  
  
The Doctor's family chortled at the wide eyed look on his face.  
  
"No, I think I can cope with Earth life well enough," he said dryly while Amy bent over laughing. "I have observed you Earthlings long enough to know what a spoon does."  
  
"Just checking," Brittany said. "I mean, E.T. had to be taught how to do some things."  
  
"That's because E.T. was a moron who let humans dress him like a girl," the Doctor said while Amy laughed harder. "And if you think I'll dress like a ghost and jump in the basket of your bicycle, think again, human."  
  
"You can't make things fly?" Michelle said.  
  
The Doctor looked at Lori with a lopsided grin. He picked Michelle up and made whooshing sounds while he held her in the air. Then he sat her back down again.  
  
"There. You flew. Want to see my glowing finger now?" he said with a wink.  
  
"You said you made that bus fly," Lori said while they headed out of the storage room.  
  
"That was antigravity clamps I put on the wheels. I don't have the power of levitation on my own," the Doctor said while Lori shut the door. "And before you ask, Shelly, I won't bond with you and go and get drunk and watch while you stagger around the room in a drunken stupor. I don't do that, either."  
  
"You're boring," Michelle said.  
  
The Doctor grinned at her and she squealed when he tickled her.  
  
"I can do this though," he said, tickling her while she tried to squirm out of his grasp.  
  
"Mommy, can we sleep down here tonight so we can hang out with them?" Michelle said to her mother when the Doctor stopped tickling her.  
  
"Yeah, can we spend the night down here?" Brittany said.  
  
"Aren't you afraid I might suck your brains out while you sleep?" the Doctor said.  
  
"Brit has no brains so you'll go hungry," Michelle said.  
  
"Speak for yourself, Creepy," Brittany said while the Doctor and his family laughed.  
  
"Creepy, they call you Creepy?" the Doctor said to Michelle.  
  
"She does but that's okay," Michelle said, pointing to Brittany.  
  
"If anyone else calls her that though, they're dead meat," Brittany said to him.  
  
"Good, I'm glad," the Doctor said, letting go of Michelle.  
  
"We can watch the parade tomorrow, you know," Michelle said to the Doctor.  
  
"Parade?" the Doctor said, frowning.  
  
"The Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade," Brittany said, "I thought you knew all this Earth stuff, E.T."  
  
"Rory, jab her with your nose, please!" the Doctor said while Amy laughed. "And…Amy….belt up before I put the cougar in your room."  
  
"Oh yes, they're taking the cougar with them when they leave," Lori said to Brittany.  
  
"Good! Take it far away and leave it on Mars or something," Brittany said.  
  
"Whooo, someone doesn't like the cougar," River said.  
  
"Sorry, my uncle got it for dad and I don't like it. Whenever it's out of its house, people slow down and gawk at it from the road. Makes me feel like a hillbilly."  
  
"Don't you need a permit for that sort of thing?" the Doctor said.  
  
"Yeah, it's a wild animal," River said. "Doesn't it need expert attention?"  
  
"You'd think so but for all I know, we're keeping it here illegally. The cops here are woefully inadequate. They do as little as they possibly can so I'm sure until Spot mauls someone they won't interfere. But anyway, I need to go back to preparing the turkey so you guys make yourselves at home. Doctor, glad to know you're not a brain sucking alien."  
  
"Nah, brains taste nasty straight from the skull," he said with a wink.  
  
"Behave, you two," Lori said to her children. "And no trips to Saturn without my permission, hear me?"  
  
Brittany shared a glance with her sister and they giggled as they nodded.  
  
"Beware of them, Doctor. You might have your hands full once they get going," Lori said before she went up the stairs.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	14. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116202) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116202)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=14) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Fourteen  
  
"Well, that went well," Rory said while Brittany and Michelle rushed upstairs to get some bedding. "At least they aren't calling the FBI in to take us away."  
  
"Nah, if they did, we'd just throw Spot in their faces," the Doctor said, leaning back on the sofabed with River.  
  
They heard the front door open and Jim announce that they were back. They heard it close and two minutes later, Rex was bounding down the stairs, tail wagging joyfully while he headed for the Doctor. He walked over to him and the Doctor smiled while he pet his head.  
  
"Hello, Reggie, done with your winter walk?" he asked him while Rex wagged his tail.  
  
Mandy came halfway down the steps and stared at them when she stopped and stood there. The Doctor got up on his elbows and waved at her. Mandy smiled and came down the rest of the stairs.  
  
"Hi," Mandy said to them while Rex walked over to her.  
  
"Hello, poppet," the Doctor said while Rex licked Mandy's face. "Did you enjoy your walk?"  
  
"Yes," Mandy said, walking towards them.  
  
Just then Brittany and Michelle came downstairs carrying blankets and pillows.  
  
"Oh no, Mandy found them," Brittany said to her sister while they came downstairs.  
  
"The more, the merrier," the Doctor said to them. "She's not hurting anyone."  
  
Mandy walked over to the TV and the Doctor's eyes widened when she made a beeline for the purple DVD case.  
  
"Spoke too soon?" Amy said, noticing the horror on the Doctor's face while Mandy opened the Barney DVD case.  
  
"Mandy, go upstairs and watch that," Brittany said while she and Michelle dropped their bedding near the sofa.  
  
"Tommy's watching Spongebob upstairs," Mandy squeaked at them while she started up the DVD.  
  
"Hold me, River," the Doctor said, feigning horror while he grabbed River from behind.  
  
"He doesn't like Barney," Michelle said to Brittany while Mandy put the DVD in the tray and closed it.  
  
"Horray, at least he's civilized," Brittany said while Mandy pushed play.  
  
The Ponds giggled while Mandy plopped down in front of the TV and began to watch the show.  
  
"I must not crack under the strain of watching Barney," the Doctor said while everyone laughed. "I must resist the temptation to run screaming from the house."  
  
"What about Spongebob?" Michelle said as she sat down by his legs.  
  
"Spongebob isn't quite as annoying as the purple t-rex," the Doctor said. "Oh why, why do you have that? I thought you humans were smarter than this."  
  
"I could go get my E.T. DVD," Brittany said in a singsong voice.  
  
"Rory, poke her with your nose," the Doctor said while everyone laughed.  
  
He smiled when Rex settled down beside Mandy, put his head on his paws and relaxed.  
  
"You could tell us a story," Michelle said to the Doctor.  
  
"Okay. Once upon a time, someone decided to make a dancing purple dinosaur and human civilization fell after that, the end," the Doctor said.  
  
"No," Michelle said, giggling along with the rest of them. "Tell us about something you did when you traveled."  
  
"Once upon a time, A woman named Amelia Pond was born and human civilization fell after that, the end."  
  
Amy discreetly flipped him off while everyone giggled.  
  
"Once upon a time," River said, raising up on her elbows, "there was an evil woman called Madam Kovarian who kidnapped a young pregnant girl called Amy Pond because she wanted to raise the child to be a weapon against a mighty warrior called the Doctor."  
  
She told them the tale of Demon's Run while the children listened in an enraptured silence. Even Mandy eventually turned around and turned her attention to River while the Doctor, Amy and Rory lay down and stared at the ceiling, listening to her while she talked. By the time she was finished, the sun was starting to set.  
  
"That really happened?" Brittany said when she finished.  
  
"That really happened," River said while the Doctor took her hand in his and squeezed it.  
  
"Wow, you fought all those people?" Michelle said to the Doctor.  
  
"Yup, with the help of my friends," the Doctor said.  
  
"Dinner!" Lori called down the stairs.  
  
"Well, thank you, my dear for providing entertainment other than the Purple Menace," the Doctor said while they all got up.  
  
She kissed her hand and held it while they followed everyone upstairs.  
  
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO  
  
After dinner, Brittany was first to take her bath so Michelle hurried to her room and took her CD player downstairs so they could have music while they waited. Mandy and Tom followed along behind her and the Doctor watched while she sat the CD player beside the TV and played her Backstreet Boys Greatest Hits CD. Tom looked at Amy for a moment before wandering over to her. He reached out with his finger and tried to touch her breast.  
  
"Hey, you little perv," Amy said, grabbing his wrist. "No, that's not nice, yeah?"  
  
"He does that all the time," Michelle said as she walked back to her place on the sofa near the Doctor's feet. "Mommy keeps telling him to stop and he won't do it."  
  
"Well, considering how territorial Rory is, I wouldn't try that again," the Doctor said while Tom walked over to Michelle's beanbag and sat down in it.  
  
"Do you like Backstreet Boys?" Michelle asked the Doctor.  
  
"They're okay. At least it's not Barney," the Doctor said. "I can sing much better than they can though."  
  
Michelle giggled when River rose up behind the Doctor and shook her head emphatically before lowering herself again.  
  
"River doesn't enjoy my musical skills but I doubt Madam Kovarian had an ear for music. Or an eyepatch for music."  
  
"No, I know good music and I know talented singing and you can't sing," River said behind him. "You think you can sing but you'd be booted off Pop Idol in ten seconds, maybe even less."  
  
"She's in denial," the Doctor said in a loud stage whisper while Michelle giggled.  
  
"Mother, why did I marry this man?" River said, leaning up and looking at Amy.  
  
"Because he said yes?" Amy said with a shrug.  
  
"I must have been suffering from temporary insanity. I didn't know what I was getting myself into," River said, lowering herself back down. "The legend blinded me to how the man really is and now I'm stuck."  
  
"We could put him in the cage with Spot," Michelle said.  
  
River roared with laughter when the Doctor jerked his head up and stared at her in shock.  
  
"Who's side are you on?" he said while everyone laughed. "I've been so kind to you and now you'll let Spot eat me? And I was considering you for my companion as well."  
  
"She just realized how childish and annoying you can be, Sweetie," River said, pinching his cheek.  
  
"I wish I could see Demon's Run," Michelle said wistfully.  
  
"After River got done describing it to you?" the Doctor said.  
  
"Better than Indiana," Michelle said.  
  
"No, actually after battling a bunch of headless monks and military men, Indiana is quite peaceful," the Doctor said.  
  
"Ooo," Mandy said, walking over to the big window. "Snow! It's snow!"  
  
They leaned up and saw snowflakes starting to fall outside."  
  
"Good thing we brought the TARDIS in here then," Rory said to them.  
  
"Maybe it'll snow fifteen feet and my stupid aunts and uncles and cousins won't come," Michelle said.  
  
"You really don't like them, do you?" the Doctor said.  
  
"They're stupid. They get drunk and do dumb things and they make fun of me," Michelle said. "I wish we could go somewhere in your TARDIS for Thanksgiving."  
  
"Well, we could but then your stupid aunts and uncles and cousins would probably ruin the house while we were gone," the Doctor said. "Besides, we said we'd stick up for you and we mean it."  
  
Michelle got up and the Doctor smiled when she hugged him and then hugged his family.  
  
"Shelly, it's your turn to get a bath," Lori yelled down the stairs.  
  
"Ugh. I'll be back, I gotta go get a bath now," Michelle said.  
  
"Get clean so we can have more fun," the Doctor called out as Michelle ran towards the stairs.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	15. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116225) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116225)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=15) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Fifteen  
  
After their baths, Brittany and Michelle went back downstairs. While they were upstairs, Jim had come down and built another fire for them to enjoy so by the time the girls came down, it was blazing and heating up the room. The Doctor and his family pulled out their snacks and let the two girls eat with them while the snow fell steadily outside. As a joke, Brittany brought down her E.T. DVD and the Doctor groaned when she put it in. The girls were now giggling hysterically while the Doctor made rude comments about the film for their amusement.  
  
"See, look at him," the Doctor said, pointing to E.T. while he waddled away from his spaceship. "Look at the way he's designed. He looks like a piece of poo with penguin feet. How is he supposed to move quickly when danger comes? Oh, wait that's right, he doesn't move fast enough and gets left behind when his poo people flee the planet. Big ostrich necked piece of poo, I could kick you down the stairs without breaking a sweat."  
  
"Wow, you really hate this film, don't ya?" Amy said while everyone laughed.  
  
"Look at me, am I a short midgety piece of poo?" the Doctor said, raising up from the bed and pointing to himself.  
  
"Yes," Michelle said.  
  
"I wasn't asking you, Bookworm," the Doctor said while she giggled. "I was asking the Ginge over there. Am I a piece of poo?"  
  
"Um…do you want an honest answer?" Amy said.  
  
"No, lie to me," the Doctor said dryly.  
  
"Okay, then. No, you're not a piece of poo," Amy said while they laughed.  
  
"Thanks, Pond," the Doctor said while they laughed harder. "And also, ALSO, if I were stranded on another planet which would be highly unlikely, I would not seek the assistance of some pot smoking teenage geeks who were playing Dungeons and Dragons while they were supposed to be babysitting. Nor would I fall for the trail of Reece's Pieces…unless trails of sweets leading to houses are a normal thing on E.T.'s homeworld, then yes, I would fall for that."  
  
"God, you're hilarious," Brittany said when she managed to stop laughing. "You're nothing like what I thought aliens would be."  
  
"Why, what did you think they were like?" the Doctor said. "Squid headed things that went "Rrrrrr" and waved their tentacle arms about?"  
  
"Yes, actually," Brittany said. "You're very humanlike."  
  
"Oughta be, I spent enough time around you lot," the Doctor said, reaching into a bag of crisps by the bed and fishing out a crisp.  
  
"Did you do this on your planet?" Michelle said, getting on her knees and folding her arms on the side of the sofa while she spoke to him.  
  
"Do what? Make fun of films while I crammed salty snacks into my gob?" the Doctor said after swallowing the crisp.  
  
"Did you have sleepovers with people?" Michelle said.  
  
"No, unless you count spending time with an old hermit on a mountain having a sleepover," the Doctor said.  
  
"Why were you spending time with an old hermit?" Amy said, looking over her shoulder at him while she sat near the end of the sofa with Rory.  
  
"Because he used to tell me ghost stories and I found it highly entertaining," the Doctor said, reaching into the crisp bag again.  
  
"What kind of ghost stories?" Michelle said.  
  
"Alien ghost stories," the Doctor said, his eyes twinkling.  
  
"Tell us one," Brittany said.  
  
"But what about the piece of poo?" the Doctor said, pointing to the TV. "You don't want to watch him stumble around and make an idiot of himself?"  
  
In response, Brittany got up, turned off the movie and the TV and walked over to the stairs. She turned off the overhead lights and walked back to her place beside the sofa.  
  
"I'm guessing that's a no," Amy said. "Apparently, they want the ghost story."  
  
The Doctor stared at the fire for a moment while he thought of one. The others waited until he finally cleared his throat, turned on his back and adjusted his blanket.  
  
"Once, long ago on Gallifrey," he intoned while everyone listened. "There lived a very old man who had the secret of immortality. Some people wondered how he managed to achieve this but he would never tell, saying only that it came at a price. Finally, a young man decided he would get the truth out of this man if it were the last thing he'd ever do so he went to find him. He found the man milking a cow inside a dairy and cornered him there, demanding to know what the secret of immortality was. Alright, I'll tell you, the man said, but you must pay the same price I did. Okay, the youth said, tell me. Well, you have to go find the planet of the piece of poo people and talk to their leader, some crossdressing git called E.T."  
  
"Geez," Amy said, rolling her eyes while the children giggled.  
  
"Okay, where do I find this planet of poo people?" the Doctor intoned. "Well, said the old man, you must follow the galactic trail of Reece's Pieces and you will find the planet of poo people. Done, the young man said and off he went on a search for Reece's Pieces."  
  
"I don't think this is what the children had in mind when they wanted to hear a ghost story from your planet," Rory said.  
  
"What? I'm telling them one," the Doctor said.  
  
"An authentic one, doofus, not the one you thought up on the spot," Amy said.  
  
"Were you there when the hermit told me this story?" the Doctor said while the children giggled.  
  
"No, but you're continuing your little rant about E.T. in the guise of a ghost story," Amy said.  
  
"E.T.'s people are real," the Doctor said. "They were known as the Poo People among the Time Lords, I grew up calling them that."  
  
"Whatever," Amy said, rolling her eyes while Brittany and Michelle laughed harder.  
  
"Anyway," the Doctor said, looking at the ceiling while Amy looked at her husband and rolled her eyes again, "the young man finally found the trail of Reece's Pieces and he followed them across the universe to a tiny planet that was brown, like the color of poo. He walked onto the planet and found the poo people. He said, make me immortal and all of the poo people said, "E.T., phone home," in a raspy voice and no matter how many times the youth asked for immortality, that's all they would say to him until he went insane and died and became an insane ghost searching for immortality. The end."  
  
Amy gave him several sarcastic claps while the children laughed.  
  
"No wonder you fled your planet if that passed for entertainment there," Rory said.  
  
"Well, we also passed the time quizzing each other on algebra problems, it was wonderful," the Doctor said.  
  
"Mm, sounds like you had a blast alright," Amy said.  
  
"Oh, it was loads of fun," the Doctor said while the children giggled. "For fun, we'd also draw pictures of various molecules and challenge others to guess what they were."  
  
"Wow, I'm sorry I missed out on that," Amy said dryly.  
  
"Your mother is very cynical, you notice that?" the Doctor said to River.  
  
"Yes, I did notice but it's probably because you lie all the time," River said.  
  
"I never!" the Doctor said with mock indignity.  
  
"Rule one…" Amy prompted.  
  
The Doctor feigned confusion and stared at her while the children giggled.  
  
"Yes?" he finally said.  
  
"You know what rule one is," Amy said.  
  
"I do?" he said.  
  
"Yes, you do," Amy said.  
  
"Well, apparently I'm having a massive brain fart at the moment because I can't recall what rule one is," the Doctor said, looking at the ceiling.  
  
"What is rule one?" Brittany asked Amy.  
  
"Rule one, the Doctor lies," Amy said.  
  
"What?" the Doctor said, feigning shock while he looked at her. "I never! How could you say that about me, Amy Pond, after all we've been through and…put that back," the Doctor growled at Michelle, pointing at her when she tried to take his bag of crisps away.  
  
The Doctor feigned anger while Michelle held the bag against her body and stuck her tongue out at him.  
  
"Mine now," Michelle said impishly.  
  
She giggled when the Doctor's mouth fell open and he stared at her in disbelief.  
  
"I just told you a story from my homeworld and how do you repay me? You steal from me!" he said.  
  
"You said I could have some," Michelle said.  
  
"I said you could have half a crisp, not the whole bag," the Doctor said, trying to grab for the bag.  
  
Michelle giggled, leapt up and ran with the bag. The Doctor sat up and everyone laughed when she opened the door of her clubhouse and ran inside with the bag.  
  
"Hey!" the Doctor said while Michelle turned on the light inside the room and came outside with no bag.  
  
She stood by the door and stuck her tongue out and laughed when the Doctor jabbed his finger at the spot where the bag had been.  
  
"Shelly, you will return that bag post haste," the Doctor said while he jabbed his finger repeatedly at the empty spot by the sofa.  
  
"What will you give me for them?" Michelle said.  
  
"I'll go to my TARDIS, grab a cricket bat and give you a beating, the likes of which you've never seen before. That's what I'll give you!" the Doctor said while the others giggled.  
  
Michelle went back inside, turned off the light and came back outside with the bag. She closed the door and trotted over to the Doctor but she stopped by the side of the sofa and gave him another mischievous look while she held the bag to her body.  
  
"Well?" the Doctor said.  
  
"I don't see any water," Michelle said.  
  
"Huh?" the Doctor said, frowning.  
  
"You said well. Wells have water in them and I don't see any water," Michelle said, looking around.  
  
"Give me the bag, Cheeky Monkey!" the Doctor said while the others roared with laughter.  
  
Michelle handed him the bag and he grinned and kissed her cheek before sharing his bag of crisps with her.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	16. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116227) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116227)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=16) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Sixteen  
  
Eventually, Lori told them they were going to bed and to be quiet if they were going to stay up. Everyone lay down and tried to sleep, except for the Doctor who lay beside his wife and stared at the fire. Brittany had spread her blankets down beside the sleeping bags and Michelle curled up in her beanbag with her blanket over her. The Doctor smiled when the two children kept giggling.  
  
"Hey, Giggleboxes, lights out," Amy teased.  
  
"Doctor isn't asleep," Michelle said, pointing to him.  
  
"I don't sleep that often so I'm enjoying the fire. But I can't do that when you're chattering like monkeys and giggling."  
  
Michelle hooted like a monkey in response and Brittney snickered at that.  
  
"I have a feeling we won't be sleeping for awhile," Rory said to his wife.  
  
"I won't be sleeping at all," the Doctor said to him.  
  
"Ooo, the Doctor's gonna watch us all night long," Brittney said, waggling her fingers.  
  
"Do aliens do that?" Michelle said.  
  
"Watch you?" the Doctor said, looking at her. "Yes, that's another pastime of ours. That's why we hover in the sky in our little spaceships. We snicker at you lot and your antics. It amuses us."  
  
Michelle got up and leaned into his face and stared at him with wide eyes. The Doctor pulled his blanket up over his face.  
  
"We don't like others watching us though, we're shy," he said under the blanket.  
  
Michelle poked him repeatedly.  
  
"And we don't like to be poked, we're tender," the Doctor said under the blanket.  
  
"Leave him alone, Creepy, he probably has some alien disease."  
  
Everyone giggled when the Doctor lowered the blanket and eyed Brittany.  
  
"I could say the same thing about you," he said to her. "You're the alien in my eyes. What if you have some weird disease?"  
  
"I don't but Creepy does."  
  
"Rory, poke her with your nose," Michelle walking over to him and pointing to her sister.  
  
"What is it with people making fun of my nose?" Rory said while everyone else laughed. "You poke her with your nose, she's your sister."  
  
"Nah," Michelle said, running back to her beanbag.  
  
"She is cheeky," Rory said to the Doctor.  
  
"Told ya, she's cheeky beyond belief," the Doctor said. "But I like cheekiness so I won't get the cricket bat and use it on her."  
  
Michelle kissed his cheek and the Doctor winked at her and squeezed her hand. She lay back down in her beanbag and everyone quieted down and began to fall asleep. The Doctor lay on his back and River snuggled against him. He put his arm around her while she lay her head on her pillow and drifted off to sleep. Amy and Rory put their hands on each other's arms and faced each other in their sleeping bags and Brittany yawned and closed her eyes. The Doctor listened to the house quieting down and stared out the window. Lori had left flood lights on and the back patio was illuminated. The snow was now blowing and swirling around and the Doctor was glad he had the TARDIS safely in the storage room. He listened to the wind howling while the snow swirled around.  
  
"I hope it snows us in."  
  
The Doctor looked back at Michelle and noticed she was still awake and watching the snow too.  
  
"Better go to sleep if you want to watch the parade in the morning, poppet," he said softly.  
  
"I'm just thinking," Michelle whispered.  
  
"About what?" the Doctor whispered back.  
  
"About you. About how you have a cool life and I wish I could go with you when you leave," Michelle whispered.  
  
"I know, love, but you're too young at the moment," the Doctor said, taking her hand in his.  
  
"You're the best thing that ever happened to me," Michelle said softly.  
  
"Well, you're one of the best things that ever happened to me," the Doctor whispered while he squeezed her hand.  
  
"Will you come back for Christmas?" Michelle asked.  
  
"Not sure. But I'll try," the Doctor said softly. "Just don't worry about tomorrow. Get some sleep and we'll have fun even if your relatives are all rubbish."  
  
"Okay," Michelle said. "I love you."  
  
"I love you too, poppet," the Doctor said fondly.  
  
Michelle got up and kissed his cheek. She whispered good night before she went back to her beanbag. The Doctor watched while she closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep. When he heard her breathing deepen and he saw her eyes move under her eyelids, he turned his attention back to the window and the snow outside.  
  
XOXOXOXOXOXOXO  
  
Michelle opened her eyes the next morning and looked over at the Doctor. The Doctor was looking at the window and she grinned as she slowly pulled her blanket off her. She tried to sneak over to him but the Doctor turned his head and smiled at her the moment she stood up.  
  
"Were you trying to sneak up on me?" he teased. "Because I'm incapable of being snuck up on, you sneaker upper!"  
  
"Good morning," Michelle said, kissing his cheek.  
  
"Morning and salutations, happy Thanksgiving, my little bookworm," the Doctor said cheerfully. "It's still snowing so perhaps you'll get your wish after all."  
  
"I wish the Doctor would shut his gob and let me sleep but I won't get that wish," Amy muttered while she kept her eyes closed.  
  
"I'm going to get some breakfast before the parade comes on," Michelle said before hurrying upstairs.  
  
"Me too," Brittany said, rising up.  
  
"Come on, Doctor," Michelle said at the top of the stairs. "Mommy makes bacon and eggs and toast. Come on!"  
  
"Better go get the bacon, eggs and toast, love," River murmured while she kept her eyes closed.  
  
"Especially since your friend is waiting at the top of the stairs for you to get up," Rory said, rising up and pointing to Michelle.  
  
"Oh, if we must," the Doctor said, sitting up with River while Amy and Rory stood up.  
  
They went upstairs, much to Michelle's delight. She waited till they were with her before walking with them into the kitchen.  
  
"Hello, everyone, happy Thanksgiving," Lori said when they walked into the kitchen. "Plates and glasses are on the counter, help yourselves."  
  
Jim, Tom and Mandy were in the other room, eating at the long table so the Doctor and his family did the same after they got their plates of food and glasses of milk.  
  
"Good morning," Jim said when they sat down. "Hope you survived the Terror Twins last night."  
  
"You mean the Bookworm and the Teenager?" the Doctor said while Michelle sat down beside him and Brittany sat down beside her. "We managed."  
  
Lori sat down beside her husband and everyone started eating.  
  
"Mommy, can we turn on the TV so we can watch the parade?" Tom asked, pointing to the TV at the other end of the room.  
  
"Yes, you can," Lori said.  
  
Tom hopped out of his chair, ran over and turned on the TV. He found the parade and went back to his seat. The children glanced at the TV while they ate their meal. The Doctor watched while a marching band walked past a camera followed by a Snoopy balloon.  
  
"Have you tried contacting anyone in the family this morning?" Lori asked her husband. "To see if they're gonna make it through the snow?"  
  
The Doctor glanced at Michelle and noticed she was now listening to her parents intently.  
  
"They haven't called so I'm assuming they're still coming," Jim said with a shrug.  
  
The Doctor patted Michelle's shoulder when her face fell and she let out a sigh through her nose.  
  
"I'll call em though, just to make sure," Jim said to Lori. "There's a lot more snow out there today. The road might be impassable right now."  
  
The Doctor smiled when he noticed the hopeful look return to Michelle's face.  
  
"You might have to stay a few days longer than you planned," Jim said to the Doctor. "The plows don't pay much attention to our road until all the other roads are taken care of."  
  
The Doctor shared a glance with Lori.  
  
"We'll make do," the Doctor said.  
  
"You're welcome to stay for as long as you like," Jim added. "The house is big enough for all of us."  
  
The Doctor noticed the hopeful look was now directed at him when Michelle looked his way. He smiled and tousled her hair.  
  
"We'll see what happens," he said more to her than to her father.  
  
After that, the adults made small talk while the children ate and watched the TV.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	17. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116245) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116245)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=17) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Seventeen  
  
After breakfast, the Doctor and his family went back downstairs with Brittany. Brittany turned on the TV and found the parade again.  
  
"Creepy, hurry up, the parade's still on," Brittany called up the stairs.  
  
"Coming," Michelle said.  
  
She came down the stairs with Mandy and Tom but they stopped near the top.  
  
"Watch this, guys," Michelle said to her friends  
  
They watched while she sat down with her legs hanging off the edge of the stairs. Then with a whoop she pushed off into the air and fell ten feet to the floor. She got out of the way and Mandy did the same followed by Tom. They laughed and climbed the stairs again and did it again. The Doctor got up, rushed up the stairs and they laughed when he sat down a few steps below them and pushed himself off, falling six feet before landing on his feet.  
  
"I can do that too," the Doctor said proudly as he walked back to the sofa.  
  
Michelle rushed down the stairs and ran to the sofa.  
  
"Can you do this?" she said to the Doctor.  
  
She lay down on her back in front of them and kicked her legs up in the air. She grabbed them and put them behind her head while she pushed the front half of her body up between the space in her legs. The Doctor's eyes boggled when she rocked back and forth this way while smacking her ass repeatedly.  
  
"Um…no, I can't do that," the Doctor said while everyone laughed. "I don't think I could get out of it once I got into it. You know, I do like my companions to have special abilities, so if I ever have need of a human pretzel, I'll be sure to contact you."  
  
They laughed when Brittany ran up and smacked her ass. Michelle laughed and did a drum roll on her own ass before she let her legs go up over her head and she straightened out.  
  
"See, you can't do that," the Doctor said to River.  
  
"I don't want to," River replied.  
  
"Shelly, look, it's Santa," Brittany said, pointing to the TV.  
  
Michelle jerked her head around and looked at the TV. Santa was in a large sleigh on a float pulled by eight reindeer statues. Santa waved to the crowd in New York while the announcers proclaimed that Christmas could officially start now.  
  
"Is this what you were waiting for then?" the Doctor teased as he walked up and bent over to look at Michelle. "Santa? I'm better than he is."  
  
"Do you deliver presents to children?" Michelle said, looking at him.  
  
"I gave you a book, didn't I?" the Doctor said.  
  
"You didn't give Brit anything," Michelle said, pointing to her sister.  
  
"I didn't know Brit that well. But…now that I do…"  
  
He walked away. They watched while he walked through the unfinished room and they heard the back door opening and closing. He came back five minutes later with another tiny Perspex box containing another silver leaf. He presented it to Brittany while Michelle watched and he explained what it was.  
  
"Whoa, cool! Thanks!" Brittany said, hugging him. "This is awesome. A leaf from your own planet. It's beautiful."  
  
"I'm glad you like it," the Doctor said, smiling.  
  
"Hey, let's go play in the snow again now that the parade is over," Michelle said to them while she turned off the TV. "We have sleds we can use. They're in the garage."  
  
She hurried into the garage and came back ten minutes later carrying large orange and blue plastic discs in her hands. Each disc had a nylon strap at the front so the person could hold on. She showed them to her friends and sister.  
  
"We can use these," she said, holding them up.  
  
"Brilliant," the Doctor said. "Let's get our gear on and have a bit of fun outside."  
  
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO  
  
After getting their winter coats and gear on, all of them went outside with Rex. Mandy and Tom were already outside, romping around in the snow and they rushed over when they saw the Doctor and Rory carrying the discs.  
  
"We have hills on all sides so we can sled down any of them," Michelle said. "Wow, it really snowed last night," she said, looking at the snow that was now nearly up to her knees.  
  
She looked up and noticed the sky was overcast with dark grey clouds.  
  
"I bet we get more," Michelle said to the others while she followed them to the front hill  
  
"Still hoping they don't come?" the Doctor said as he sat the orange disc down at the top of the hill.  
  
"Yeah. I hope…"  
  
She trailed off when she spied a white pick up truck driving down the road. The truck had a plow fixed to the front of it and she groaned when it passed by and made the road passable. They watched while the truck stopped at their driveway and went down it, making that passable too. The Doctor patted her shoulder when she sighed angrily.  
  
"We'll have fun even if they do come," the Doctor said.  
  
He sat down in the disc and put his knees up to his chest, putting his feet inside it while he grabbed the nylon strap.  
  
"Push me!" he called out.  
  
Mandy sloshed up behind him and pushed on his back. Tom came up and helped and the Doctor grinned as they pushed him nearer the slope of the hill. Then he was away and he whooped as he slid down the hill. He kept on sliding till he reached the driveway and then he stopped and sat there.  
  
"Okay, pull me back up again," he yelled out.  
  
He looked over his shoulder and saw Rory coming down on the blue disc while the children cheered. He stuck his right foot out, pretending to clothesline him while Rory stopped near him.  
  
"Blast, you stopped too soon," the Doctor said to Rory.  
  
"No, I stopped just in time to avoid your leg in my face," he said while he and his friend got up.  
  
Rory walked back up the hill with the disc. The Doctor followed him but halfway up he pretended to struggle and let out a huge grunt.  
  
"Must muster the strength to go on," he gasped while the children laughed. "Can't go on. Strength…failing."  
  
The children laughed harder when he let go of the disc and fell down belly first in the snow. He flailed around for a moment before he lay still with his arms and legs askew and his face turned to the side as he lay on the snow. Mandy hurried down the hill to him.  
  
"Ah, little Mandy, help me, please," the Doctore said.  
  
His eyes bulged when Mandy smacked his ass and screamed, "GET UP!" Everyone laughed when the Doctor raised his head and stared at her.  
  
"Someone needs to tutor you on how to properly help someone," he said to Mandy while she giggled.  
  
Amy hurried down the hill and the Doctor's mouth dropped open when she smacked his ass.  
  
"You heard her, get up!" Amy said while Mandy laughed hysterically.  
  
"Fine, I'm getting up," the Doctor said as he rose up.  
  
He brushed the snow off his body and picked up the disc. He walked the rest of the way up with Mandy and Amy and handed the disc to Amy when they reached the top. Amy got in and pushed herself and whooped while she slid down the hill. Michelle took the blue disc from Rory. They watched as she took a running start, leapt up and landed belly first inside the disc, sliding headfirst down the hill.  
  
"Why don't you do that?" River said to her husband as she pointed to Michelle.  
  
"Because I'm not the Human Pretzel," the Doctor said as Michelle slid to a stop near Amy.  
  
He pet Rex and woofed a greeting to him while Amy and Michelle walked back up the hill. For a few hours, they took turns sledding down the hill. Then the Doctor heard Michelle groan and turned to see a black SUV coming down the road.  
  
"That's my Aunt Ruth and Uncle Dan," Michelle said to the Doctor while the SUV beeped at them before slowing down and turning into the driveway.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	18. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116291) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116291)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=18) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Eighteen  
  
Michelle stood near the Doctor while the SUV pulled into the driveway and parked.  
  
"What's so bad about these people then?" the Doctor said to Michelle as Uncle Dan turned the car off.  
  
"Aunt Ruth's okay but Uncle Dan likes to drink beer and he gets drunk and says mean things," Michelle said.  
  
"Sounds like a typical family gathering," Amy said.  
  
The car doors opened and Aunt Ruth got out of the car. Ruth resembled Lori except she was slightly older, fatter and had bigger breasts. She was wearing a white cashmere sweater, black slacks and black flats. Her brown hair was short and curly with just a tinge of grey in it. Uncle Dan was tall, lean with salt and pepper hair, a deeply lined face with jowls and he wore glasses with wire rimmed frames. Both of them paused and looked at the Doctor and his family in confusion for a moment before shutting the car doors and heading up the brick steps to the porch. Brittany, Mandy and Tom ran to them and said hello but Michelle hung back with the Doctor before reluctantly trudging over to them. Ruth hugged all the children warmly but Dan walked past them and headed up to the door without saying hello or hugging any of them.  
  
"So, who is this?" Ruth said, gesturing to the Doctor when she got done hugging the children.  
  
"This is the Doctor, Aunt Ruth," Brittany said. "And this is Rory and River and Amy. They're traveling and they're eating dinner with us today."  
  
"Well, good thing we brought enough turducken for everyone then," Ruth said. "Nice to meet all of you. I have to go in and say hello to my sister but we'll be back out to get our food in a minute."  
  
Michelle hung back while the rest of the children went back inside. She walked over to the Doctor.  
  
"Turducken?" the Doctor said.  
  
"Yeah, they bring it every year," Michelle said. "It's turkey, duck and chicken all at the same time. It's turkey stuffed into a duck that's stuffed into a chicken."  
  
Amy laughed when the Doctor gave her an odd look.  
  
"Three different birds in one?" he said slowly. "Are you serious?"  
  
"Yeah, Aunt Ruth likes to bring it because then people can choose what they want to eat," Michelle said.  
  
"But…why not bring three separate birds or just pick one?" the Doctor said. "Blimey, you humans are weird sometimes. It's like when I ate that chicken/beef thing in the Crusader vehicle. Still, I can think of worst things to combine together. Your Aunt Ruth seems okay but your Uncle Dan didn't even say hello as he passed by."  
  
"He does that. He'll say hello but if he's busy, he ignores everyone. And he gets really mean when he gets drunk. But they're not that bad compared to my cousins."  
  
"Why? What's wrong with your cousins?" Rory asked.  
  
"They like to hunt and shoot things," Michelle said.  
  
"That doesn't sound that bad," the Doctor said. "I don't like to shoot things and I don't go hunting but lots of people hunt things and they're not mean to other people."  
  
"But my cousins, they're…rednecks. They're racist and stupid and just…ugh, you have to see them to get what I'm saying," Michelle said.  
  
"Do you think they'll come?" River asked her.  
  
"Probably, they got great big trucks to hold all their hunting stuff. They go hunt every winter so they could drive through this snow," Michelle said.  
  
They shut up when they heard yelling coming through the bay window. The Doctor listened closely. He could hear Jim yelling and a second male voice that he assumed was Dan's. A moment later, the front door opened and an exasperated Brittany came outside with Tom and Mandy running outside behind her, frightened looks on their faces. She slammed the door and sighed while Tom and Mandy ran to the Doctor and his family.  
  
"It's started already," Brittany said to them while she walked down the porch steps.  
  
"Why? What's going on?" the Doctor said as they walked towards her.  
  
"Uncle Dan wants to bring his beer in and drink it and Dad's arguing with him now because he told him no," Brittany said. "This happens every year. I don't know why they bother coming."  
  
"Don't they realize you lot are upset now?" Rory said.  
  
"Yeah, Dad knows, that's why he told me to take everyone out here," Brittany said, sitting down on the side of the porch. "Ruth is mom's sister. Dan isn't blood related. He's a controlling asshole, to put it mildly. Aunt Ruth's been married to him for years and she doesn't want to divorce him so she lets him bully her. Aunt Ruth is nice like mom is, she deserves better than that twat, pardon my French. He's also upset that you guys are here because I think he doesn't want strangers seeing how he behaves when he gets drunk so Dad's defending you along with telling him he can't have his beer."  
  
Brittany looked over her shoulder when the door opened and Ruth stepped outside, a sheepish look on her face while the yelling continued inside the house. She closed the door and gave everyone an apologetic look.  
  
"I'm sorry about this," she said to them. "My husband likes to drink and his brother is telling him he can't which is making him angry."  
  
"Well, I think that's a good thing, considering there are children present," River said.  
  
"I know but Dan has a temper," she said. "He does this frequently."  
  
The Doctor listened to her being evasive and wondered if she was being abused at home. The smile on her face was strained as she walked off the porch. She asked everyone to help her carry the food inside and the Doctor took Michelle's hand while they headed down the hill to the car. Ruth opened the hatch in the back while Brittany and Michelle opened the back doors. When the Doctor looked in the back door, he noticed a box of thirty beers on the floor on the passenger side and shook his head. He grabbed a white plastic sack filled with food and handed it to Michelle before taking another sack. River and Rory grabbed two more sacks from the other side. Rory caught the Doctor's eye and gave him a pointed look while he pointed to the box of beers.  
  
"I know," the Doctor murmured to him. "I'm not carrying it in."  
  
"Neither am I," Rory said.  
  
They shut the doors and waited for Ruth, Amy and Brittany to unload from the back. Amy was carrying a bulky item in a glass pan. The item was wrapped with aluminum foil and it looked turkey shaped so the Doctor assumed it was the turducken. Ruth had a large pot that was covered and Brittany was carrying a brown grocery sack filled with food. Ruth thanked everyone before closing the hatch. They walked back up the hill with the food. By now, the house had fallen silent and the Doctor was thankful for that. Michelle was walking beside him and he could tell she was apprehensive about going on, although she said nothing while she slowly went up the brick steps.  
  
"So, where are you from then?" Ruth asked the Doctor.  
  
"Venus," Michelle murmured to herself.  
  
The Doctor heard her and grinned at that.  
  
"We're from London," he said to her. "We were traveling across Indiana and out hiking and we decided to see if we could find someone that would let us share their dinner with us."  
  
"Frankly, you might regret coming here by the end of the day," Ruth said to him. "But I'm glad you're here. We always make more than enough for us so there's no problem feeding all of you."  
  
They paused on the steps when they suddenly heard a high-pitched horn beep out the Dixie song and they turned to see a large white pick-up truck slowing down as it neared the beginning of the driveway.  
  
"That's one of my cousins," Michelle said to the Doctor while she pointed to the truck.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	19. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116313) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116313)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=19) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Nineteen  
  
They watched while the truck pulled into the driveway. It was a white pickup truck but on the side someone had painted the Confederate flag along with the words, YOU CAN HAVE MY GUN WHEN YOU PRY IT FROM MY COLD, DEAD HANDS.  
  
"Oh look, dearest, I think we found a catchphrase for you," the Doctor said, pointing to the words while the truck slowed down and parked beside the SUV.  
  
The man driving the truck had closely cropped black hair that resembled the way the Doctor had his hair in his ninth life. He was a bit pudgy with dark brown eyes. Next to him was a man who looked similar to him except his dark hair was in a mullet and he had a bit of growth on his lean face. They looked at the Doctor and his family and stared at them in silence for a moment.  
  
"Will these blokes be carrying guns," Amy said while the Doctor waved back cheerfully, "and will we have to pry them from their cold, dead hands to get the guns away from them?"  
  
"Didn't the American Civil War end about a hundred and fifty years ago?" Rory said, folding his arms over his chests. "I had no idea there were still Confederates in the US at this time."  
  
The doors opened and the men got out. Ruth glanced at the children before walking down the hill towards them.  
  
"Do these delightful chaps belong to Ruth then?" the Doctor asked the children.  
  
"They're her sons," Brittany said. "They don't live at home any more though."  
  
"I gather not since they're apparently off fighting the American Civil War," the Doctor said.  
  
Brittany snickered at that.  
  
"They're racist, remember?" Brittany said as she leaned in to his ear. "Confederates didn't like black people and they don't either so…stars and bars."  
  
"Lovely, just the sort of people you want to share turducken with," the Doctor muttered while Brittany snickered.  
  
"They shoot Santa too," Michelle said, looking over her shoulder at him.  
  
"They do what?" River said, doing a double take.  
  
Brittany sighed.  
  
"The reason why they come to our house is because Mom refuses to take us to their houses," Brittany said. "And it's because every Christmas they'd go outside with a shotgun and pretend to shoot Santa as a joke. Except it scared Shelly one year and she ran screaming and hid in a closet. Everyone laughed at that except Mom and Dad and it pissed Mom off so much we haven't been back to their houses since."  
  
River's mouth dropped open while the Doctor looked at Amy and Rory.  
  
"Them?" River said, pointing to the men who were now chatting with Ruth by their truck. "They did that?"  
  
The children nodded and River glared at the men.  
  
"River, don't," the Doctor said, stepping up beside her. "Don't do anything to them."  
  
"I won't but believe me, I'll really have to restrain myself," River growled.  
  
She backed up away from the porch when the men turned and walked with Ruth up to the house. She glared at the men when they gave her suspicious looks.  
  
"You know what?" River said to her friends and family, "let's go around back and have some more fun."  
  
"Yeah, I'm not eager to meet these people," Amy said.  
  
They grabbed the discs and headed around the back of the house.  
  
"It's nice to know that you didn't turn out like them," Rory said to the children while they walked.  
  
"Mommy told us that they are wrong to hate other people like that if they're different from us so we don't," Michelle said.  
  
"Good," the Doctor said. "I'm glad someone in your family has some sense."  
  
"Wanna go back to the creek?" Michelle asked them.  
  
"Where's that?" the Doctor said.  
  
"See those trees?" Michelle said, pointing to the forest beyond the barren field. "There's a creek running through them. Daddy built a bridge there and a little playhouse for us so we go back there and play."  
  
"Sounds good to me," the Doctor said.  
  
They stepped off into the snowy field and trudged along. The Doctor heard his name being called and turned to see Lori. She was standing on the upper deck.  
  
"We're walking back to the creek," the Doctor called out when she asked where they were going. "They want to show us their playhouse."  
  
"Don't be gone long," Lori called out. "And be careful. I'll yell when dinner's ready, okay?"  
  
"Okay, Mommy," Michelle called out.  
  
Lori waved and went back inside as the Doctor and his family turned and followed the children. The field was an acre wide so it didn't take very long to get to the wooden bridge inside the forest. A creek ran about ten feet below it but at the moment it was frozen over. On the other side of the bridge by the other field was a large blue, wooden playhouse with a yellow shingle roof. The door to the playhouse was yellow and so was the trim around the windows.  
  
"We wade in that sometimes when the water's warm," Michelle said, pointing down to the frozen creek while they walked across the bridge. "But we gotta be careful cause there's leeches in there."  
  
"Yeah, Shelly went in there one day and splashed around and when she came back out, she had about five leeches on her legs. Dad had to burn them off with a lighter."  
  
"I was once the prisoner of a madman who tried to kill me with a leech that was the size of a rhino," the Doctor said. "It would have sucked all the blood out of my body in five minutes."  
  
"Ewww," Mandy said, making a face.  
  
"Yes, it was quite slimy and gory," the Doctor said.  
  
They crossed the bridge and carefully walked to the snow to the playhouse. Michelle opened the door and went inside. The children followed and the Doctor and his family bent down to get inside. Inside the ceiling was high enough that they could stand up. The interior was cold but cheerful with yellow painted walls, a blue wooden floor and tiny chairs and table near the back and a small wooden toy chest near the door. Toys and games were scattered all over the floor.  
  
"This is nice," the Doctor said, looking around.  
  
"We like to come here and play," Mandy said.  
  
"We like to walk to the woods too," Tom said, pointing to the woods in the distance.  
  
"You have a lot of freedom here," the Doctor said as he picked up a My Little Pony coloring book and flipped through it.  
  
"Nothing happens out here," Brittany said with a shrug. "There's an abandoned railroad track about a mile from here. We walk out to it and walk down to Kennard, which is about two miles away."  
  
"See, that's one of the advantages of living out in the country," the Doctor said, sitting down on the floor beside the chairs. "You can have more freedom and there's less worry about crime."  
  
"That's why Mom and Dad wanted to live out here," Brittany said, sitting down on the other side of the room. "They like it out here. It's kinda far to the city but it's quiet and peaceful."  
  
"Except when the dummies come," Michelle said as she and Tom and Mandy sat in the chairs.  
  
"Are more dummies coming then?" Rory asked as she and Amy and River sat beside the Doctor.  
  
"Probably," Michelle said. "But the main buttholes are here now. My Uncle Dan and Cousin Jack and Cousin Randy, they make the most trouble."  
  
"Randy, eh?" the Doctor said with a huge grin.  
  
"Yeah, he was the one driving the truck," Brittany said. "Why? What's so funny?"  
  
"Randy is a slang word for horny in Britain," the Doctor said.  
  
Brittany snickered.  
  
"Yeah, Randy is randy at times, that's for sure," Brittany said while Michelle giggled.  
  
"He's always talking about who he's been dating," Michelle said, turning in her chair so she could see the Doctor. "They sound like ugly dogs when he talks about them."  
  
"Probably desperate too," Brittany said.  
  
"And I knew a Jack who was also very randy," the Doctor said. "Is Cousin Jack randy as well?"  
  
"No, he's antisocial and a felon," Brittany said.  
  
"Really, why is he a felon?" Rory said while the Doctor looked at the coloring book and listened.  
  
"He stole a bunch of printers from his workplace and tried to sell them," Michelle said.  
  
"Seriously?" Amy said. "He's a thief?"  
  
"Yup," Michelle said. "My grandma died a few years ago and he had to come to the funeral in handcuffs."  
  
"Yeah, they wouldn't let him out of them," Brittany said. "Aunt Ruth and Uncle Dan were angry but the cop that went with him to the funeral didn't let him out of them. He had them on his wrists and on his ankles."  
  
"Charming," River said. "So which one of them shoots Santa?"  
  
"Dunno," Michelle said. "We didn't go out and watch. But they were both laughing while they did it."  
  
"Like I said, charming," River said. "Compared to them, this house will seem cozy."  
  
"Yes but we can avoid them, it' s a large house," the Doctor said. "We'll just go downstairs and eat in Shelly's secret spot and lock the door."  
  
"Sounds good to me," Michelle said.  
  
The Doctor shushed them all for a moment.  
  
"Your mother's calling us, we have to go," he said, standing up.  
  
"Wow, you have good hearing," Brittany said.  
  
The Doctor gave her a smug look and then winked as everyone got up and headed out of the playhouse.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	20. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116314) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116314)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=20) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Twenty  
  
When they came out of the woods, the Doctor waved to Lori who was standing on the upper deck.  
  
"We're coming!" he yelled, cupping his hands to his mouth.  
  
Lori nodded and went back inside while everyone headed for the house. They noticed another car was coming up the driveway now. A dark blue Prius.  
  
"That's our Great Aunt Alicia and Great Uncle Tom," Brittany said, pointing to the car as it went past the other cars and parked in front of the garage. "Our Tom was named after him."  
  
"And what do they do?" the Doctor said while they walked.  
  
"Fall asleep in the chairs and wear Depends," Brittany said. "They're not offensive, at least not like our cousins and Uncle Dan. They're just very old and act like old people."  
  
"So they fart a lot," Tom said.  
  
"They do?" Amy said to Tom. "Will they fart on the turducken then?"  
  
The children giggled.  
  
"No, they poop on it," Tom said.  
  
"I'll poop on it as well. Turducken is rubbish," the Doctor said while the children giggled. "I hope your mum has some proper turkey for me to tuck into."  
  
"She does," Brittany said. "She hates turducken too."  
  
"Good. I like your mum more and more with each passing minute," the Doctor said.  
  
"Marry her, then," Mandy said.  
  
"I am married," the Doctor said while the children giggled. "I'm married to River."  
  
"That must be a wet marriage if you're married to the river," Michelle said.  
  
She squealed and the others laughed when the Doctor let out a roar and chased her. He pretended to trip and let out an "Aaaah!" as he slowly fell down. He lay face first in the snow while the children laughed. Mandy trotted up to him and bent over.  
  
"Are you dead now?" she asked.  
  
"No," the Doctor said while the others laughed. "If I were dead, I wouldn't be talking to you."  
  
"Then get up!" Mandy said, smacking his butt.  
  
Tom giggled and came over and smacked it with her. They continued to smack his butt while they screamed for him to get up.  
  
"Excuse me, companions and wife of mine? Assistance would be nice!" the Doctor yelled while Mandy and Tom smacked his butt and laughed. "My bum is tender now and you're standing about laughing at me!"  
  
"Hey!" Amy said, walking up to Mandy and Tom.  
  
"He won't get up," Mandy said to Amy.  
  
"Well, stop hitting his bum and give him a chance to," Amy said with a wink.  
  
They backed off and the Doctor got up and brushed the snow off him, smiling when Mandy and Tom brushed the snow off his trousers.  
  
"Right, let's sally forth and get us some scrumptious turkey then," the Doctor said to them when they finished getting the snow off his body.  
  
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO  
  
When they reached the house, they went in through the garage to avoid the family upstairs. But when they stepped into the den, they saw Alicia and Tom sitting on the sofa bed, chatting while they enjoyed the newly made fire. The children ran to them and hugged them, except for Michelle. She hung back with the Doctor and took his hand while he and his family followed the others. Alicia and Tom were both in their 70's with wrinkled faces, white hair and jowls. Both of them were wearing wire rimmed glasses. Tom was dressed in a brown suit with white shirt and blue tie and Alicia was wearing a floral print dress with a blue shawl around her shoulders. She smiled warmly at the Doctor.  
  
"Lori told us about all of you," Alicia said in a slightly quavering voice. "Happy Thanksgiving."  
  
"And you," the Doctor said.  
  
"Well, let's go upstairs and eat," Alicia said to the children.  
  
Rory assisted Alicia up the stairs while the Doctor went up beside Great Uncle Tom.  
  
"So, you're from England?" Tom asked the Doctor.  
  
"Yes, I am," the Doctor said.  
  
"I've been to England before in my younger days, beautiful country," Tom said.  
  
"I think so too," the Doctor said.  
  
Lori looked over the partition as they reached the top of the stairs.  
  
"That's all that's coming today, everyone else decided to stay in," Lori said to them. "The snow was brutal in some areas."  
  
"Phew," Michelle said softly.  
  
Alicia thanked Rory when she reached the top step and stepped up into the hallway. She and her husband made their way to the big table which now had two extra leaves added to it. The Doctor walked over to Lori and whispered in her ear.  
  
"You do have regular turkey, right?"  
  
"You mean turkey that isn't turducken?" Lori said softly.  
  
She snickered when the Doctor widened his eyes and nodded.  
  
"Yes, we do. I don't like that turducken crap either," she said softly. "Why? They didn't have turducken where you came from?"  
  
"Thankfully, no," the Doctor said while Lori laughed.  
  
Most of the family were sitting at the table, except for Uncle Dan and Jim. Randy and Jack were eyeing them while they walked into the living room and Amy put her hand over her mouth to hide her giggles when the Doctor began softly whistling Dixie to her. Michelle stayed close to her friends while they walked towards the table.  
  
"Look, the brainiac doesn't have a book with her," Randy said to Jack. "Maybe she's gonna be sociable for a change."  
  
River let out a low growl but kept silence while she pulled out a chair for Michelle. The Doctor looked around for Lori but she'd gone into the kitchen. Michelle was about to sit down when Randy suddenly shook his head.  
  
"They eat in the kitchen," Randy said. "The children's table."  
  
The Doctor froze and gave him a dirty look.  
  
"That's the way it's always been," Randy said smugly to him. "The children eat in the kitchen and the adults eat out here."  
  
"Fine," the Doctor said. "Children, come with me."  
  
The Doctor took Michelle's hand and the children followed them. He very pointedly sat down at the kitchen table with the children and Michelle smiled while she sat down next to him.  
  
"I'm a child at heart so I belong here," the Doctor said, loud enough for the people in the other room to hear.  
  
Dan, Jim and Lori were standing by the stove. Dan was giving the Doctor an odd look but Lori was smiling and nudging Jim.  
  
"Children, come and get your food," Lori said to them.  
  
Everyone got up and walked over to the counter which was now filled with food. There were plates, glasses and silverware by the food along with some napkins. Lori walked over to the Doctor and pointed out the turkey for him. While he was helping himself to some, she leaned in.  
  
"Thank you for that," Lori said. "Jim and I actually don't mind the children sitting with us but they do so I'm glad you made a point of sitting with them."  
  
"Well, from what I've seen and heard, I have a feeling the children will be better behaved than the adults," the Doctor whispered.  
  
Lori snorted and nodded emphatically. She patted him on the shoulder and told him to help himself to as much as he wanted. The Doctor thanked her and piled his plate with food before sitting back down with the children.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	21. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116325) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116325)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=21) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Twenty One  
  
The Doctor grinned. He could hear the stilted conversation in the other room, so different from their table where they were laughing and teasing each other. He guessed Lori's family were trying to behave themselves since there were others present now. To be honest, he actually preferred to be with the children. He was currently taking the mickey out of Brittany because she was eating some turducken just to spite him. She was making a point of taking a huge exaggerated bite and chewing it with her mouth open while the children laughed.  
  
"You're just begging to be slapped, aren't ya?" the Doctor said after the third big bite of turducken.  
  
"Just making you squirm," Brittany said after swallowing the bite in her mouth.  
  
"Humans, you disgust me," the Doctor said to her.  
  
He eyed Michelle and she giggled when she tried to sneak a bite of his macaroni and cheese.  
  
"You don't want that," Michelle said, pointing to his macaroni and cheese with his fork.  
  
"You don't want this either," the Doctor said, taking her glass of milk and putting it by his.  
  
"You're right, I don't," Michelle said with a shrug.  
  
"Now wait a moment, milk is good for you, it grows your bones so you can become a six foot monster," the Doctor said.  
  
"You're a six foot monster!" Mandy said to him.  
  
"Yes and I can stomp you into the snow so beware!" the Doctor said to Mandy. "I am fierce and strong and will you lay off my macaroni cheese?" the Doctor said to Michelle when she tried to take it again.  
  
"You don't want that," Michelle said, pointing to it.  
  
"You don't want a black eye either but I will oblige you with one," the Doctor said, poking her side playfully.  
  
"I'm not afraid of you," Michelle said with another shrug.  
  
"You should be, you should be very afraid," the Doctor said, waggling his fingers.  
  
Michelle grinned and pressed on his nose.  
  
"See, not afraid," she said smugly.  
  
"Do that again and see if you live to tell the tale," the Doctor said.  
  
Michelle pressed on his nose again and waited.  
  
"Do that again, I wasn't ready to kill you just then," the Doctor said.  
  
The children giggled while she pressed on his nose a third time.  
  
"Weird, I can't seem to muster up the strength to kill you. Must be some sort of force field holding me back," the Doctor muttered.  
  
Michelle hopped her chair and ran back to the counter.  
  
"I think I'll get you some turducken now," she said to the Doctor.  
  
"You wouldn't dare," the Doctor said while the children giggled.  
  
"I'll get you some tur…duck…en," Michelle said in a singsong voice.  
  
"I'll give you a black eeeeye," the Doctor said in a singsong voice.  
  
"Turducken for you then," Michelle said, grabbing a large piece from the pan.  
  
"No, anything but that!" the Doctor said with fake horror as she carried the piece back to him in her hands. "You fiend! How dare you! No!" the Doctor said when she put the piece of turducken on top of his macaroni and cheese and sat back down beside him.  
  
"You fiend!" the Doctor said while the children laughed. "You have sunk to an all new low with this one and on top of my macaroni cheese too. You fiendish fiend!"  
  
By now the Doctor was aware that the other room was silent and he figured they were listening to them. He was surprised his family members hadn't joined them yet since he didn't hear any laughter coming from them. His attention turned back to Michelle when she tried to get his macaroni and cheese again.  
  
"You don't want that," Michelle said before letting out another giggle at the peeved look on his face.  
  
"You're just asking for a smack bottom, aren't you?" the Doctor said while the children laughed. "First you terrorize me with turducken then you try to take my macaroni cheese from me."  
  
"Why do you keep calling it macaroni cheese?" Michelle said. "It's macaroni AND cheese."  
  
"Not in England," the Doctor said smugly. "I go by what England does and I say it's macaroni cheese."  
  
"If England jumped off a cliff would you do it too?" Michelle said.  
  
The children laughed when the Doctor gave her a bemused look.  
  
"Are you referring to England, the people or England, the landmass? Because if you meant the landmass, that is both impossible and silly," the Doctor said.  
  
"I meant England, the landmass," Michelle said.  
  
"Then I would have to say no because England jumping off a cliff is both impossible and silly."  
  
"But you're impossible and silly," Brittany said. "So you'd be in good company."  
  
"Shut your noise, you," the Doctor said to her with a grin while the children laughed. "We weren't including you in our discussion."  
  
"I know, I included myself so there," Brittany said before sticking her tongue out.  
  
The Doctor paused for a moment.  
  
"Want some turducken?" he said to her, pointing to the mass of meat with his fork.  
  
"No, that's a gift from my sister," Brittany said. "It would be rude not to eat it."  
  
"Well, I am rude so…do you want it?" he said to her.  
  
"Eat it!" Tom said.  
  
"You!" the Doctor said while he giggled. "You open up your pie hole and shove it in, I'm not touching it with a barge pole!"  
  
"Okay, you lot are having way too much fun in here," Amy said, coming into the room. "Everyone in here stopped talking long ago just so we could hear you."  
  
"Pond! Help me! They're trying to forcefeed me turducken! Me no want!" the Doctor said while the children laughed. "And the macaroni cheese thief is trying to pilfer my pasta! Help!"  
  
"It's macaroni AND cheese!" Michelle said.  
  
"She also insists on being American which is annoying me to no end," the Doctor said." I keep telling her to be British and she won't have it."  
  
"You're not British anyway, so there," Michelle said smugly.  
  
"I'm more British than you are, Yank!" the Doctor said to her.  
  
He frowned when Michelle reached up and tugged briefly on his ear.  
  
"What was that about?" he asked her.  
  
"You said to yank so I did," Michelle said.  
  
"And she keeps insisting on taking my words and literalizing them," the Doctor said to Amy while the children giggled.  
  
By now, Rory and River had appeared in the doorway with Amy.  
  
"Did they put caffeine in your milk or something?" Rory asked. "You lot are beyond hyper."  
  
"Well, he did say he belonged at the children's table," River said with a shrug.  
  
"He won't eat turducken," Mandy said to them.  
  
"Now, now, Doctor," Amy said, walking over to him. "Eat your turducken like a good little boy."  
  
The Doctor clamped his mouth shut and folded his arms over his chest while the children giggled.  
  
"Mm-mm," the Doctor said, shaking his head and clamping his lips shut when Amy pulled off a tiny piece and tried to put it into his mouth.  
  
"Come on, eat it!" Amy said, putting the slice of meat against his lips.  
  
"Mm-mmmmm," the Doctor said while the children laughed.  
  
He eyed Michelle when she tried to get his macaroni and cheese again.  
  
"You don't want that," Michelle said, pointing to it.  
  
The Doctor pointed to Amy then pointed to Michelle and put his fist into his open palm while giving Amy a pointed look.  
  
"Hit you? You want me to hit you?" Amy said, feigning confusion.  
  
The Doctor gave her a withering look while the children laughed.  
  
"Where did you find these limeys?" they heard Jack say. "Those Brit fuckers are completely nuts."  
  
A silence fell over the house and Michelle and Brittany shared a look.  
  
"Right, suddenly the children's table sounds great," Amy said before she, Rory and River turned and went to get their plates.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	22. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116327) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116327)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=22) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Twenty Two  
  
The Doctor listened while his family was in the other room. No one was saying anything but you could cut the tension with a sonic screwdriver. The Doctor expected River to say something to that but she hurried into the kitchen along with her parents, carrying her plate and glass of milk. They made room at the counter and sat on the bar stools.  
  
"Thank God, the limeys have left the table," they heard Randy say.  
  
"Thank God, we're not with the racist rednecks anymore," Amy muttered to everyone.  
  
"Will you stop calling them that?" they heard Lori say. "They're our guests."  
  
"This is a family gathering," Dan said. "They need to go back to England where they came from!"  
  
"Or Venus," Brittany muttered, sneaking a glance at the Doctor.  
  
"What's wrong, are you afraid they'll see how you act?" Lori said.  
  
"Go Lori," Amy murmured while she looked at her husband and daughter.  
  
"How we act? That one limey is in there making a fool of himself!" Randy said.  
  
"Moi?" the Doctor said, pointing to himself while the children giggled.  
  
"He's entertaining the children," Lori said. "He's friends with them now."  
  
"Friends in what way?" Dan sneered. "Is he a pedophile? You know those Brits are supposed to be fags."  
  
"Ooooo," Brittany said.  
  
"Fags? I'm not a cigarette," the Doctor said to his family.  
  
His family snickered while he winked at them.  
  
"Don't you dare call them that!" Lori snarled.  
  
The Doctor sighed when Mandy put her hands over her ears and whimpered.  
  
"Yeah, this is the very reason time travel was invented," Amy said. "So we can travel to people's houses and listen to their fights."  
  
River noticed the fear on the younger children's faces and the distress on Michelle's face and she let out an angry sigh as she threw her fork onto her plate.  
  
"River, don't!" the Doctor said while she got up from her stool.  
  
River ignored him and walked into the other room.  
  
"Excuse me, I hate to interrupt your charming little fight but the children are upset now and afraid and covering their ears. So I suggest you stop it because you're ruining their holiday!"  
  
River turned and walked back to her chair. The Doctor grimaced when she froze the moment she heard Randy say, "Whatever, bitch," and he saw her clench her fists.  
  
"River, no. Sit down," Amy said sternly when she saw the look of death on her daughter's face.  
  
"Everyone, come with me," the Doctor said, getting up. "Let's go downstairs and have some of our snacks. We can get away from all of this. Come on, loves," he said to the younger children, beckoning to them to follow him.  
  
The children left the table with the Doctor and his family followed them, encircling and forming a shield around them. The Doctor ignored Lori and the others and everyone followed him as he led them downstairs. The Doctor listened to Lori berating her family but he hurried everyone over to the fire and let the children sit on the sofa while he pulled out the snacks.  
  
"I told you, we can have fun on our own and I meant that," he said to the anguished children. "Turn on the telly and have some crisps and pop and we'll have our own Thanksgiving celebration here."  
  
"Can we go somewhere in your TARDIS and eat?" Michelle said. "Just us?"  
  
The Doctor was about to say something to that when Lori came downstairs.  
  
"Guys, I'm sorry for that," she said as she walked over to them. "I did warn you about our relatives and I'm sorry they ruined your dinner."  
  
"Mommy, can the Doctor take us somewhere in his TARDIS so we can be away from them?" Michelle said.  
  
"Would you do that for them?" Lori said.  
  
"I don't mind if you don't mind," the Doctor said.  
  
"Just take the children somewhere. I can stay here and cool things down," Lori said. "Just be sure to bring them back close to this time and I'll tell everyone you're calming down the children and cooling off."  
  
"As you wish," the Doctor said while Michelle and Brittany shared a delighted look.  
  
"Mommy, come with us," Michelle said.  
  
Lori gave her daughter a hug and a kiss.  
  
"No, I have to stay here for the moment but you go and have some fun," she said to them. "And we'll do something special tonight after you get back and everyone's gone. Okay?"  
  
They nodded and Lori hugged the Doctor, thanking him for coming to visit them and staying with the children.  
  
"My pleasure," the Doctor said, hugging her back.  
  
Lori hugged Amy, Rory and River and gave them the same thanks. She kissed her children and told them to be good before heading back upstairs.  
  
"Wow, now we have to tell Mandy and Tommy about the Doctor," Michelle said to Brittany.  
  
XOXOXOXOXOXO  
  
Mandy and Tom's eyes widened when the Doctor showed them into the TARDIS.  
  
"Are you magic?" Mandy asked the Doctor.  
  
"Yes. I'm very magical and this is my magical ship that will take you anywhere you want to go," the Doctor said. "We're going to go somewhere nice and finish eating. Just follow me."  
  
Mandy and Tom followed the Doctor and their sisters while they walked up to the console. River shut the door after Amy and Rory were inside and they headed up the stairs after them. He let them sit in the seats and they watched while he made a big show of starting up the TARDIS.  
  
"Are we going to Turducken Land?" Michelle asked him.  
  
The Doctor's family giggled while he feigned anger at that.  
  
"How dare you suggest such a thing?" he said to her as he typed something on his typewriter. "I wouldn't dirty my TARDIS by landing in such a place."  
  
"I want to go somewhere fun," Tom said.  
  
"FUN?" the Doctor screeched while everyone laughed. "You mean we can't go to Lintville, home of lint?"  
  
"NO!" the children yelled in unison.  
  
"But…lint is fascinating," the Doctor said while his family laughed. "Haven't you ever looked under your bed and looked at the lint? It's marvelous."  
  
"Take us to Turducken Land!" Michelle said.  
  
"I'll take you to the Everlasting Bottomless Hole of Doom and put you in it headfirst if you don't shut your gob," the Doctor said, wagging his finger at her.  
  
"I'm not afraid of you!" Michelle squealed at him.  
  
"You will be!" the Doctor yelled back while the children giggled. "River…um…"  
  
"Yes?" River said.  
  
"Push her nose in and show her I mean business," the Doctor said, pointing to Michelle.  
  
River grinned. The Doctor watched while she walked over and nuzzled Michelle's nose with her own.  
  
"No, push it not nuzzle it, I do believe I was specific just then," the Doctor teased while River patted Michelle on the head.  
  
He finished inputting his destination and gave the children an impish look while he grabbed a lever.  
  
"And now…we fly!" he yelled before he pulled the lever.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	23. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116330) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116330)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=23) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Twenty Three  
  
The TARDIS powered down and the Doctor smiled at the children. They had been laughing at the wild ride and hanging on to the railing while the timeship zoomed through the vortex.  
  
"Care to guess where we landed?" the Doctor said to the children.  
  
"Turducken Land!" Michelle squealed.  
  
"No!" the Doctor squealed back while everyone laughed. "We landed nowhere near a turducken."  
  
"We're on Venus," Brittany said.  
  
"No, ick. Why would we go there for Thanksgiving?" the Doctor said, making a face.  
  
Mandy hopped off the chair. The Doctor stuck his hands in his pockets and watched while she walked down the steps towards the front door.  
  
"Hey! Wait, there are things out there," the Doctor said melodramatically while Mandy went to the front door. "You mustn't! You'll get eaten by Floofahs if you step outside."  
  
Mandy ignored him and walked to the door.  
  
"Doesn't listen, does she?" the Doctor said before he took a running leap off the platform.  
  
Mandy turned when he landed loudly on the floor near her.  
  
"I believe I mentioned the Floofahs, yeah?" the Doctor said, strolling the rest of the way towards her. "They're giant purple lint balls that love children. You'd do well to listen to me and…"  
  
The children laughed when Mandy reached up and opened the door, watching him while she opened it a tiny bit.  
  
"Floofahs are out there," the Doctor said, pointing to the door.  
  
Mandy smiled and impishly opened the door a bit more.  
  
"Okay, you wanna get eaten for lunch, go right ahead," the Doctor said, tapping his foot impatiently.  
  
"Mandy, listen to him," Michelle said as she and everyone else came down the steps. "There might be danger out there."  
  
"Nah, there isn't any," the Doctor said.  
  
"I wouldn't be too sure of that," Amy muttered.  
  
The Doctor took Mandy's hand and he finished opening the door. Mandy looked out and saw a park. There were trees scattered around the park area and a little path several feet away. People were walking down the path or sitting on a few wooden benches, chatting and laughing.  
  
"Come, my family and friends," he said as they stepped outside. "This…everyone is London, England. This is Hyde Park on the very same day we left your house. As you can tell it's a bit chilly today but as you can also see, there is NOTHING happening in London on Thanksgiving. In London, Thanksgiving is known as Thursday and here we are!"  
  
"What we gonna do here?" Mandy asked him.  
  
"Stare at the scenery and think to ourselves "We're in London while our parents are in Indiana," the Doctor said to her.  
  
"I wanna see horsies," Mandy said, turning and heading back inside.  
  
Everyone laughed when the Doctor feigned shock while Mandy walked back inside the TARDIS.  
  
"It's London," the Doctor said to Mandy while he pointed out at the park. "You can see horsies any day."  
  
They looked in the open door and watched while Mandy climbed the stairs, walked over to the chair by the monitor, sat down and waited for them to come back inside.  
  
"Horsies!" Mandy squealed to them when they didn't move.  
  
"Um, yeah…this is London," the Doctor said weakly while everyone laughed. "So now on to horsies, I suppose."  
  
He was about to go back inside when he froze. Michelle saw the stunned expression on his face and looked where he was looking. She saw a tall thin man coming down the path. He had on a brown pinstriped suit and brown trenchcoat and had brown spiky hair. He was talking to a red haired woman beside him while they leisurely walked the path.  
  
"What's wrong?" Michelle said, glancing at the Doctor.  
  
"Um…remember when I told you about regeneration and how I had different bodies. That's the body I had before this one. That man in the brown suit is me."  
  
Everyone did a double take and looked at the tenth Doctor. The ginger haired woman caught sight of the TARDIS and stopped the man, pointing to it.  
  
"Hey, what's that doing here and who is that in front of it?" the woman said as she pointed.  
  
"Hey, I wanna see horsies now!" Mandy said from the interior while the Tenth Doctor studied the Eleventh.  
  
Michelle glanced at her Doctor before she walked toward the other Doctor. Ten smiled warmly and knelt down to her.  
  
"Hello there," he said when Michelle walked up to him.  
  
"Hi, I'm Michelle. I'm traveling with the Doctor and his family and my sisters and brother and we came here cause my stupid family back home was arguing at Thanksgiving so the Doctor back there took us here and he said you were him so I wanted to say hello."  
  
"Did you get all that, Donna?" Ten said, winking at his companion.  
  
"I think so, except the part about him being you," Donna said, pointing to Eleven.  
  
"You're more knowledgeable about me than my friend, Donna, is," Ten said to Michelle. "She doesn't know about regeneration. I keep forgetting to tell my friends about it. So…your family is arguing then?"  
  
"Yeah, they came to my house to eat dinner with us," Michelle said, pointing to the Doctor. "And my uncle and cousins said mean things about him and we got mad so Mommy told the Doctor he could take us somewhere else for a bit."  
  
"I see," Ten said, straightening up.  
  
He took Michelle's hand and beckoned to Donna before they walked to the TARDIS.  
  
"The wee bairn here says you're having a spot of bother with her family members?" Ten said to Eleven when they reached him.  
  
"To put it mildly," Eleven said.  
  
He quickly introduced his family and Michelle's family and pointed to Mandy who was now standing by the console.  
  
"And this is Mandy who wants us to go see horsies and doesn't like the delay," Eleven said to his counterpart.  
  
He stepped aside and let Ten go inside with Donna.  
  
"Wow, this is different," Donna said, looking around at the interior. "Looks more like a spaceship than yours does."  
  
"Hello, small one," Ten said to Mandy while he and Michelle walked towards her. "I'm the Doctor. My future self says you want to see horsies?"  
  
"Yes," Mandy said when he walked up the steps to her.  
  
"Well, I don't think there are horsies around here but you found another Doctor which is just as good," the Doctor said, leaning over and getting eyelevel with her.  
  
"Will you come and tell my cousins to shut up?" Mandy asked him.  
  
"Tell your cousins to shut up?" Ten said. "You mean the ones that are arguing?"  
  
Mandy nodded and the Doctor leaned back up and rubbed his chin thoughtfully.  
  
"Hear that, Noble? We're needed somewhere. A small child has just asked for our assistance. Think my other self will let us assist the child?" he said to her.  
  
"Does this happen often? You finding your other selves?" Donna said.  
  
"Oh, it happens on occasion," the Doctor said. "So…what about it, my other self? Shall we go and sort out the kerfuffle back at Michelle's house?"  
  
"Can I help with that?" River said as everyone else stepped inside.  
  
The Doctor glanced at his past self but he didn't register any recognition at seeing River so he figured it was early days in his travels with Donna.  
  
"I welcome any and all help," Ten said. "After all, I need my friends to back me up. So…shall we go and see what's what and clear the mess up then?"  
  
The Doctor glanced at his family and he snickered.  
  
"Just…let me fill you in on her family and their peculiar interests," Eleven said, closing his TARDIS door.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	24. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116334) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116334)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=24) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Twenty Four  
  
Lori sat at the table, fuming at her relative's behavior. After the Doctor left, no one said anything more, only ate in silence. Lori resolved to never invite Randy, Jack or Dan to her house ever again after this fiasco.  
  
While they ate, Lori heard the Doctor calling her name from downstairs. Before anyone could make a snide comment about the "Limeys" she excused herself and headed downstairs. When she went downstairs, she paused when she saw Ten and Donna standing with the others. The Doctor smiled and walked towards her.  
  
"Lori, I wanted to introduce you to two additional guests," he said.  
  
XOXOXOXOXOXOXO  
  
Lori was stunned when she learned who the guests really were and heard what happened while they were gone.  
  
"And you're serious about this? You want to get involved?" Lori asked Ten when the Doctor finished explaining the situation.  
  
"I always assist someone when they asked me for help," Ten said. "Especially children. I also don't like this whole shooting Santa thing."  
  
Lori looked at Michelle.  
  
"You told them that?" she said.  
  
Michelle nodded.  
  
"Look, we're not all like them," Lori said, embarrassed.  
  
"I know, my other self filled me in," Ten said. "He likes you. But he and I came up with a way to get back at your relatives."  
  
"How?" Lori said.  
  
Ten and Eleven grinned as they shared a glance.  
  
"Well, what we came up with is a little less extreme than my first idea which was dressing up as a confederate soldier while Donna dressed in Klan robes. But…I can imitate any dialect in the universe so I'm going to pass myself off as a hick American southerner. And the TARDIS can altar my appearance temporarily to make me look more yokelish. So, come with us and we'll tell you our plan."  
  
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO  
  
"I wonder if the limeys are gonna come back up here and eat?" Randy said, nudging his brother. "They probably don't have any guts left after running away. I'm sure that one Brit is downstairs, whining to Lori about how unfair we were."  
  
"Will you be quiet?" Alicia finally said. "You're acting like a couple of idiots."  
  
"They never should have invited them," Randy said to her. "We don't need a bunch of limeys invading our house, especially at Thanksgiving. This is our holiday, not theirs! I'm sure they're planning to take back the US and make it part of their empire again!"  
  
While this was going on, everyone was standing out of view near the top step.  
  
"There isn't a British empire anymore, idiot," Amy muttered.  
  
Lori looked at Ten and Donna. The TARDIS had given them a holographic disguise that enveloped them on all sides and looked real. The Doctor and Donna were dressed like rednecks. The Doctor's hair was still spiky on top but the back had been lengthened into a mullet. He wore a safety orange t-shirt that had an outline of a hunter holding a shotgun and the words I'D RATHER BE HUNTING under it. His brown trousers had been replaced by camouflage ones and there was a fake tattoo of the Confederate flag on his right arm. Donna's red hair was cut short in a butch cut and she looked like she had missing teeth. She wore a red and green plaid shirt with green trousers and army boots. Ten giggled when he got another look at his companion.  
  
"That is definitely your look, Donna," he said softly to her.  
  
"Yeah, well you need to take a look at yourself in the mirror, Yokel Boy," Donna said softly.  
  
Ten winked at her before looking at Lori.  
  
"Whenever you're ready," he said to her.  
  
Lori grinned and she got in front of Ten and Donna while the others stood on the steps and listened.  
  
XOXOXOXOXOXOX  
  
"Everyone, I have an announcement to make," Lori said when she stepped into the hallway. "Some cousins of mine made it here today."  
  
Everyone stared as Ten and Donna showed themselves.  
  
"Howdy y'all!" the Doctor said with a heavy American Southern accent. "I'm Bucky and this is Lurlene. We managed to make it up here in time for Thanksgiving."  
  
"Who?" Randy said. "I've never heard of em."  
  
"Well, they're…distant cousins," Lori said. "They don't get out much."  
  
"Nah, we usually stay down in our hometown of Bear's Bollocks, Tennessee. But we decided we were lonely and we wanted to come and share Thanksgiving with y'all," Ten drawled. "Ain't that right, Lurlene?"  
  
Donna hesitated a moment, knowing she was useless at doing Southern accents.  
  
"Yeah," she finally said in a deep, manly voice.  
  
Ten looked at her and she shrugged.  
  
"Lurlene was one of them lesbians," Ten drawled. "But she found Jesus Christ and by the power of God, she was saved and now she likes dick. Praise Jesus!"  
  
The whole table was silent while everyone stared at Ten and Donna in silent shock. Lori had her hand over her face, trying to hide her silent laughter. She glanced at her husband.  
  
"What's going on?" he mouthed to Lori.  
  
"I'll tell you later," Lori mouthed back.  
  
Ten reached into the bigger on the inside pocket of his trousers and pulled out a can of Budweiser beer. Randy and Jack did a double take when he pulled off the pull tab and took a swig.  
  
"Lori, hon, where's our food?" Ten drawled. "We came all this way. We want some vittles now!"  
  
"Yeah!" Donna said in a deep voice.  
  
"Um…come with me," Lori said, trying not to laugh out loud.  
  
Ten and Donna got up and followed her into the kitchen. She waited till she got over to the sink before collapsing against it in silent laughter.  
  
"Wow, that was…different," Lori said when she could find her voice. "Is that how you think humans act?"  
  
"Not all humans," Ten said in his normal voice. "But I'm doing an over exaggeration of a redneck human."  
  
"I'll say," Lori said. "I'll have to explain all this to my husband now but this is so worth it, just to see the looks on my asshole relative's faces. It's nice to see someone mocking them for a change. Help yourselves to whatever you want to eat, you're earning it as far as I'm concerned."  
  
"Lori, what the hell is going on? Who are these people?" Jim said, coming into the kitchen.  
  
"Jim, come with me to the bedroom and I'll explain. You two help yourselves to the food and keep going. Come with me," Lori said to her husband.  
  
Ten watched while Lori took her husband out of the room before looking at Donna.  
  
"What's with the "Yeah!" he said, imitating her deep voice.  
  
"I can't do an American accent like you can and I don't want to tip everyone off that I'm English," Donna said to him.  
  
"Actually, use your normal accent," the Doctor said. "And posh it up, it'll confuse them more."  
  
Donna grinned and nodded. They grabbed a couple of plates and heaped food onto it.  
  
"Here, have a beer, Lurlene," the Doctor said, tossing her another Budweiser from his pocket.  
  
"Awfully decent of you, old chap," Donna said with a nasally posh accent.  
  
Ten and Donna grinned at each other, grabbed their plates, silverware and cans of beer and hurried into the other room.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	25. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116339) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116339)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=25) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Twenty Five  
  
The Doctor stood on the steps with his family and the children. All of them were trying not to laugh but it was difficult not to.  
  
"I love that they're being silly and acting stupid like my cousins," Michelle said.  
  
"Hopefully, this will teach them to behave if they ever decide to come back here again," the Doctor said, patting her shoulder.  
  
"Okay, sorry about that y'all, we're back now," they heard Ten say.  
  
The Doctor put his finger to his lips and silenced everyone while they listened.  
  
XOXOXOXOXOXOXO  
  
"So," Ten said, plopping down in his seat while Donna did the same, "nice to see the kinfolk on this day of blessings and thanksgiving. Sorry we never really met, we've been busy hunting. Bagged a forty point stag the other day in the woods out back of our trailer. Big old bastard. Took a machine gun to bring him down."  
  
He took a swig of his beer while Donna opened her can. Ten glanced at Dan while he drank and noticed the envious look on his face. His counterpart had told him about the case of beer in Dan's car which was why he was rubbing it in now.  
  
"You found a forty point stag?" Randy said to Ten. "There's no such thing!"  
  
"There is in Tennessee, they grow em big down there," Ten said after swallowing the beer. "Isn't that right, Darlin'?" he said to Donna.  
  
"Oh, absolutely," Donna said with her posh accent. "We had a spiffing good time shooting that deer. And now it'll make a jolly good addition to our collection of dead animal heads."  
  
Ten bit his lip when everyone stared at Donna now.  
  
"After that, we attended a very lovely Klan rally on the steps of the courthouse," Donna said. "Down with the darkies and all that."  
  
It was Ten's turn to hide his smile behind his hand since now everyone was completely confused. No one had touched their food since they started this and Ten actually saw Randy and Jack shift uneasily.  
  
"Yup," Ten drawled. "Gotta kill all the non whites in the world. White supremacy rules."  
  
"I completely agree," Donna said. "Or send everyone back where they came from. They should just erect a load of bally fences around every country's border and electrify it so no one can escape. America for the Americans, that's what I say!"  
  
"If you're American, how come you got a British accent then?" Randy said.  
  
"What accent, love?" Donna said to him. "I'm American, through and through. Was born and bred in Bear's Bollocks. You must have confused me with another bally chap."  
  
Doctor, Ten thought to his counterpart.  
  
Yeah? Eleven thought back.  
  
Send one of your companions out here so we can taunt the Brits, eh? Ten thought back to him.  
  
Eleven grinned.  
  
"I need a volunteer," Eleven said to his family.  
  
"Me!" Michelle said, raising her hand.  
  
"No, love, they have to have a non-American accent this time," Eleven said.  
  
"I'll go," River said.  
  
"Will you restrain yourself?" Eleven asked her.  
  
"Depends on what those gits say to me," River said.  
  
Eleven glanced at Amy and Rory before he nodded to River. River grinned and casually walked up the rest of the stairs.  
  
"So anyway," Ten drawled to Lori's stunned relatives, "we go huntin' a lot. Bagged all kinds of critters, especially swamp gators. We have several swamp gator rugs on the floor and…hey!" Ten said when he spied River walking towards him. "There's one of those limeys now! Go back where you came from, limey scum!"  
  
"Quite right," Donna said to River. "You do not belong in the good old U.S. of A. Take your person and get thee hence to the nearest boat, post haste!"  
  
River gave Donna an odd look. Donna shrugged.  
  
"Not good at being posh," she mouthed to her when she turned her back to the others at the table.  
  
River nodded.  
  
"Look, you can't threaten me," River said to Ten when he stood up with Donna. "I have every right to be here."  
  
"So do I," Ten drawled. "And I have every right to order you out of my country, limey! Get back where you came from and leave America to the Americans."  
  
"Could you stop, please?"  
  
Ten shut up when he heard Randy. He glanced at Donna and they turned around.  
  
"What? I'm just telling the limey to get the hell outta our country," Ten said to Randy.  
  
"I don't know who you are but you're no relatives of ours," Randy said.  
  
"No, we're not," the Doctor said in his normal voice. "But we were asked to come here after you called our friends names and made a scene."  
  
"You're British?" Great Uncle Tom said.  
  
"Yes," Ten said.  
  
"How'd you get here?" Jack said. "Are there a bunch of lime…"  
  
He swallowed hard when Ten glared at him.  
  
"Are there a bunch of British people roaming around Indiana now," he corrected himself.  
  
"Donna and I were in town and the Doctor rang us and asked us to come here. We decided to show you our interpretation of a redneck. We thought you'd enjoy it since you seem to enjoy hunting and hate people who aren't American and Caucasian. But apparently we went too far, even for you. You not only upset our relatives but also yours. Michelle and Mandy and Tom and Brittany are all upset by your behavior."  
  
"And frankly, after hearing what you did, they seem better behaved than you," Donna said.  
  
"We're sorry we ruined your plans for a relatives only dinner," River said. "But this is Jim and Lori's house and they apparently had no problem with us being here. Frankly, my family and me are disgusted that people like you can still act the way you do. This is the twenty first century, not the nineteenth."  
  
"Well said," Great Uncle Tom said.  
  
"And I don't normally drink beer but I also heard you threw a fit when you couldn't bring beer in here and get drunk," Ten said to Dan.  
  
"I wasn't going to get drunk, I just wanted a few beers with my dinner," Dan said angrily.  
  
"You get drunk, you get drunk all the time."  
  
They looked over when Michelle came around the partition with her family and the Doctor, Amy and Rory.  
  
"You get drunk and get mean," Michelle added while they walked over to the table. "And you say I'm a retard because I like to read instead of talking to you."  
  
"And you keep saying racist things," Brittany said to Randy and Jack. "You go on and on about how other races need to go back where they came from like it's the Civil War or something."  
  
"And you pretend to shoot Santa," Michelle added. "And that's why Mommy won't let us come over to your houses anymore."  
  
The Doctor looked at Lori's family. Everyone had gone silent but he could see a triumphant smirk on Ruth's face and he suspected she'd wanted to say the same to her husband for some time. Dan looked at Randy and Jack and as one they rose from the table.  
  
"Fine, we're going then," Randy said. "Since we're not wanted here."  
  
"Happy Thanksgiving," Jack said in a snotty voice.  
  
"Come on, Ruth, we're going," Dan said to his wife.  
  
"No, I'll find a way home later. You go on without me," Ruth said.  
  
The Doctor started to come to Ruth's defense when Dan gave her a dirty look. But he nodded at his sons and glared at the Doctor before the three of them walked past the group and headed towards the front door.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	26. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116360) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116360)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=26) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   


Author's Notes:

For everyone who thought I made a mistake in chapter twenty when Eleven said that he was a child at heart and belonged at the children's table. I meant to write at heart in that situation since Eleven was talking to people who were not aware he was an alien so that's why I used at heart instead of at hearts.   
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Twenty Six  
  
"Well, that was easy," Ten said as the Doctor and his family and friends went back into the kitchen. "Easiest meal I ever earned."  
  
They had refilled their plates with fresh food and sat back down at the kitchen table and at the counter. Both Donna and Ten turned off the holographic disguises and they looked like their normal selves now. Ten and Donna sat on the stools with Amy and Rory while the others sat at the kitchen table. The Doctor took a bite of turkey and made an "Mmm" sound while he ate.  
  
"Normally I don't accept rewards but I'll make an exception for this," Ten added. "Good job you thought of coming here for Thanksgiving," he said to his counterpart. "This is delicious."  
  
Eleven sighed when Michelle tried to take his macaroni and cheese again.  
  
"You don't want that," Michelle said before giggling at the exasperated look on the Doctor's face.  
  
"You know, I could stuff the macaroni cheese in your ears and render you deaf," the Doctor said to her.  
  
"It's macaroni AND…"  
  
She laughed and bolted from her chair when the Doctor tried to tickle her.  
  
She went back to her seat when Lori came into the room and smiled at them.  
  
"Good, you're eating," she said. "I was just about to ask you to help yourselves. Also, I wanted to ask you to stay at least until supper tonight. I have something special for all of you that I want to make for supper. And that includes you," she said to Ten and Donna.  
  
"We'd love to stay," Ten said.  
  
"Good. Because I want to thank you all. Now if you don't mind, I want to speak to my relatives. I did explain to my husband about you being an alien and he finally accepted it after I showed him the leaf you gave me. Now I want to tell my sister and my aunt and uncle. So keep eating and hang out. And don't worry about the dishes when you're finished, we'll take care of them. Just relax and have fun."  
  
She stared to go out the door and then turned back to them.  
  
"And Jim and I want to tell you that you're always welcome here whenever you want to come, all of you," he said, nodding at Ten and Donna.  
  
"Thank you," Ten said.  
  
Lori nodded and left the room. They heard her telling her relatives to come with her because she needed to tell them something. Michelle waited till they were gone before she looked at Eleven.  
  
"Come for Christmas, please," Michelle said to him.  
  
"Yeah, we can have fun and we'll get all of you presents," Brittany said.  
  
"We'll see what happens," Eleven said while the others nodded in agreement. "We'd love to come but sometimes life interferes. But we will make an effort to come."  
  
After eating, Brittany took everyone on a tour of the house. The door to Jim and Lori's bedroom was closed and the Doctor could hear Lori talking to everyone as they passed by. They showed them the bedrooms and the Doctor's eyes boggled when they went into Michelle's bedroom and he saw all the books.  
  
"My, my, quite a collection you have here," Ten said, perusing the shelves. "Ooo, Secret Garden. I'll have that and Peter Pan and I need another copy of Hunger Games."  
  
"Hey!" Michelle said, rushing over to him when he started to take the books out and tuck them under his arm.  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry, I thought these were here for the taking," Ten teased as he put them back.  
  
Michelle walked over to her beanbag and picked up the book on Gallifrey the Doctor had given her.  
  
"I gave her that as a gift," the Doctor said when Michelle brought it to him. "Since she loves to read, I thought I could entrust her with this."  
  
"Ooo," Ten said, taking the book, "this is very special so please take care of it, yeah?"  
  
"I will," Michelle said.  
  
"What is it?" Donna said as she came up beside him.  
  
"It's one of a series of books on the history of Gallifrey," Ten said to her. "Very old and very valuable. This is an heirloom so keep it safe," he said to Michelle.  
  
Michelle nodded and held it close to her chest while Ten put his hand on her head. She had Eleven put it on the top shelf of her cupboard before all of them left the room. They headed downstairs and Michelle showed them her secret room.  
  
"Blimey, you have a small library in this house," Ten said when he saw the rest of the books. "You and I could definitely be friends."  
  
"The Doctor told me I could be a companion someday," Michelle said to him.  
  
"Well now, that is a possibility," Ten said, leaning in close. "Yes, you look like a companion. Perhaps you could be one."  
  
He grinned when Michelle's face lit up at that and he patted her head. They walked outside and Ten and Donna looked around.  
  
"What's this?" he said, pointing to the unfinished room.  
  
"It was going to be a home bar but they never finished it," Brittany said to him.  
  
"It's haunted, there's a ghost back there," Michelle said.  
  
"There is? Hmmm, I should investigate then," Ten said, whipping out his sonic.  
  
He walked through the doorway and they heard a humming while he turned on his sonic and saw a blue light illuminating his face while he pretended to look for ghosts. Michelle walked over and went inside.  
  
"Hey," she said to him.  
  
"Ah!" Ten yelled, feigning fear while he spun around.  
  
Michelle giggled at that.  
  
"Don't do that, I'm easily scared," Ten said while everyone else came up to the counter and peered inside the window.  
  
"What's that?" Michelle said, pointing to the sonic.  
  
"It's a sonic screwdriver. It helps me find ghosts," Ten said to her.  
  
"Have you found any yet?" Mandy said, coming inside the room.  
  
"Nope. I haven't found anything because it's dark in here," Ten said.  
  
Brittany reached around the doorway and turned on the light.  
  
"Oh, that's helpful," Ten said, looking around while the children giggled. "So…is this thing for your uncle's benefit then?"  
  
"The bar?" Brittany said as she leaned on the counter.  
  
"Yeah. Did your uncle request this thing be built so he wouldn't have to drive to an actual bar?" Ten said to her.  
  
"Sorta," Brittany said. "Dad likes to drink sometimes but not to the point of getting drunk. They thought they could throw parties down here which is why the den is huge."  
  
"And they don't do that?" Ten said to her.  
  
"Sometimes but I think when my uncle became an alcoholic, they abandoned this so he wouldn't be tempted to hang out here and get sloshed every day," Brittany said.  
  
"Very sensible," Ten said. "I don't know your uncle that well but anyone who brings a case of beer to a dinner doesn't need a bar in the house. Although…"  
  
He picked up a dusty shot glass from the counter beside him and inspected it for a moment before he set it down on the counter. Then he picked up a slightly dirty rag from beside the sink and pretended to wipe down the counter with it.  
  
"Hello," he said to everyone while he wiped the counter down. "I'm the landlord of this pub. What's your poison, mates?"  
  
"What's that mean?" Brittany said.  
  
"Means I own this pub so what ya want to drink, eh?" Ten said to her.  
  
"I want milk," Michelle said.  
  
"MILK? We don't serve milk in me pub, on your bike, mate!" Ten said, pointing to the garage door while everyone giggled.  
  
"I want three fingers of brandy," Brittany said.  
  
Ten paused in his wiping and stared at her.  
  
"How old are you?" he asked her.  
  
"Fifteen."  
  
"How do you know how to ask for that then if you're underage?" he said to her while everyone laughed.  
  
"I heard it in a movie once," Brittany said with a shrug.  
  
"Oh! Phew, I thought you were an adolescent alcoholic for a moment," he said while everyone laughed harder.  
  
"What does it mean, the three fingers thing," Brittany asked him.  
  
"You fill the glass up to the height of three fingers," the Doctor said, putting three fingers on the outside of the shot glass to demonstrate. "So if you wanted three fingers of brandy, you would fill up to the top of the third finger."  
  
"Weird," Brittany said. "I would just tell them to give me a glass of brandy."  
  
"Nah, you don't want that, you want a nice cold pint of bitter," Ten said to her.  
  
"What's that?" Brittany said.  
  
"Ale," the Doctor said. "You have bitter which is ale, you have lager which is beer or you have shandy which is half beer and usually half lemonade. You have your pints and half pints and that's the size of the glass the beverage comes in."  
  
"It's nice that you're telling her all this when alcoholism runs in her family," Amy said to him.  
  
"You know enough to stay away from heavy drinking, right?" Ten asked Brittany.  
  
"After watching my drunk relatives, hell yeah," Brittany said.  
  
"Then this is just for informational purposes," Ten said to her.  
  
"Shandy sounds like that Mike's Hard Lemonade stuff," Brittany said to him. "My cousins like that stuff."  
  
"Yes, but I'm sure it tastes like crap since it's made with American beer," Ten said. "You want beer you get a nice lager from an English pub."  
  
"Hear, hear," Amy said, nodding.  
  
"So…what's in here then?" Donna said, coming through the door and pointing to the bathroom door.  
  
"That's the bathroom," Michelle said. "It works."  
  
"Oi, get out of my pub. You're not supposed to be behind the counter," Ten said to her.  
  
"Oh, button it, Mister Landlord," Donna said to him before she went into the bathroom and closed the door.  
  
"She's not supposed to be back here," Ten said to the others while they snickered.  
  
"Hey, wanna see something cool?" Michelle asked Ten.  
  
"Do I?" Ten said, throwing the rag onto the counter. "Show me something cool then!"  
  
Michelle opened the door to the storage room and asked Brittany to help her. They went inside and a few moments later they came out carrying a stag's head mounted on a plaque. They showed it to Ten.  
  
"Okay, where's the cool thing then?" Ten said, looking at the children.  
  
"This," Michelle said. "It's a deer's head."  
  
"I see that but that's not a cool thing to me," Ten said. "It's more like a dead deer head and I pity the poor deer, to be honest. Where'd you get that?"  
  
"Cousin Jack shot it and gave it to Dad two Christmases ago," Brittany said, rolling her eyes.  
  
"And your father very sensibly chucked it in the cupboard when Jack left," Rory said.  
  
"Yup. He thought it was stupid," Brittany said.  
  
"I like your father more and more," Ten said. "I don't mind hunting if it's for survival purposes but I don't get mounting a head on the wall as a form of decoration."  
  
"Especially since the deer was minding its own business to begin with," Eleven added.  
  
Mandy went into the storage room and came out with a stuffed rabbit that was mounted on a long piece of wood. The rabbit was brown with dark eyes and it was sitting on the wood.  
  
"And Jack the Animal Hater got your father this as well?" Ten said, pointing to it.  
  
"He was proud of that because it was the first thing he killed with a bow and arrow," Brittany said. "He started out with shotguns and then moved on to bows and arrows."  
  
"But where's the sport in it?" Eleven said. "These are passive animals. If you're gonna hunt, hunt a tiger. Something that could kill you if you made a wrong move and it's all life and death then. Don't shoot animals that aren't bothering anyone."  
  
The children took the animals back into the storage room.  
  
"I'm surprised Jack the Animal Assassin didn't ask why his trophies weren't being displayed prominently in the house," Ten said to everyone.  
  
"He probably knows the reason why," River said. "I'm sure his uncle has made it quite clear that he hates his hobby."  
  
Michelle came out of the room carrying a small porcelain figure of a geisha. Ten's eyes lit up.  
  
"At last, something cool," he said, carefully taking it from her. "This is beautiful," he said, running his finger down the figure's pink kimono.  
  
"Great Uncle Tom got that when he went to Japan," Brittany said, coming out of the room. "Years and years ago."  
  
"This is exquisite," Ten said, passing it to Eleven. "I love the cherry blossoms on her kimono. The artistry is quite…OI! NOBLE, DID YOU FALL IN THE LOO?" he suddenly screamed to the closed door. "DO WE NEED TO FISH YOU OUT?"  
  
"BUGGER OFF, SPACEMAN!" Donna screamed back while everyone laughed.  
  
"Wow, language, forgive my companion for her potty mouth," Ten said.  
  
"Maybe she's having diarrhea," Mandy said to him.  
  
Ten and Eleven sniggered.  
  
"MANDY WAS WONDERING IF YOU HAD A TOUCH OF THE LIQUID SQUIRTS, LOVE!" Ten yelled at the door while everyone giggled.  
  
"YOU'RE GONNA THINK LIQUID SQUIRTS WHEN I BASH YOUR BRAINS OUT OF YOUR HEAD!" Donna yelled back.  
  
"Her bowels are in a spot of bother at the moment, bless," Ten said while everyone laughed. "Anyway, is there anymore cool stuff we can see?" he said, handing the figurine back to Michelle when everyone was done looking at it.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	27. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116361) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116361)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=27) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
Chapter Twenty Seven  
  
After Donna came out of the bathroom, they spent some time in the storage room exploring it. Eleven smiled when Donna looked at a box of Christmas ornaments with him.  
  
"So, this is the next version of you," Donna said to him while she examined a reindeer plushie.  
  
"Yup, this is me," Eleven said, pleased to hear her voice again.  
  
"Where am I? I mean, you have your friends but how come I'm not with you," Donna said softly to him.  
  
Eleven's hearts ached at that but he managed to hide his anguish.  
  
"You left me," he said softly.  
  
"Why?" Donna said with genuine confusion.  
  
"I can't say," Eleven said sadly.  
  
"Did we have a falling out? You didn't want me anymore and wanted me to leave? I mean, could you tell me that much?"  
  
"No, we didn't have a falling out. It's just circumstances that were beyond our control and I'll leave it at that," Eleven said.  
  
"Oh God, I end up like Rose," she said.  
  
Eleven swallowed hard and shook his head.  
  
"No," he said softly.  
  
"Is she still lost?" Donna asked.  
  
Eleven nodded and Donna patted his shoulder.  
  
"I won't say anything more then," she said, putting the plushie back into a big cardboard box.  
  
Eleven looked at her sideways while she pulled out a midnight blue ball ornament.  
  
"You are missed," he said softly so his counterpart couldn't hear him. "I miss you every day, Donna. Just remember that."  
  
Donna smiled at that and gave him a sideways hug. She patted his cheek when his eyes misted over and the Doctor kissed the top of her head in return. He smiled when Michelle came to his side. She reached in and carefully took out a small snowflake ornament with her name on it.  
  
"Mommy and Daddy got this when I was born," she said, pointing to it.  
  
"So I can smash it then?" Eleven said, poking her rib.  
  
"Can I throw your book into the fireplace if you do?" she said, poking back.  
  
"You're mean," Eleven said while Donna giggled.  
  
"Yup!" Michelle said, putting the ornament back in the box.  
  
"Whoa!"  
  
They looked over when they heard Amy and watched while she pulled out an old 8 track player from a pile of junk.  
  
"I've never seen one of these before," Amy said, examining it.  
  
"There's some 8 tracks in one of the boxes," Brittany said over her shoulder.  
  
"Do you have a pet rock in here as well?" Ten said to her while he examined a lace tablecloth.  
  
"Probably," Brittany said with a shrug. "Dad keeps a lot of junk in here. He doesn't throw things out that often."  
  
"Sounds like me," Ten said. "You oughta see the cupboards in my TARDIS. I think I have about one of everything the Earth ever produced in them."  
  
"Hello."  
  
They looked at the doorway when Great Uncle Tom appeared and spoke to them. He caqme inside the room.  
  
"Lori explained what was going on and told us about you two," he said, pointing to Ten and Eleven. "I have to admit I thought it was a joke but she showed us this silver leaf you gave her as a gift and I've never seen anything like it. I thought it was fake but after examining it, I could tell it was very real."  
  
"You're just giving away all my possessions, aren't you?" Ten teased his counterpart.  
  
"They twisted my arm, honestly," Eleven teased back.  
  
"I want to apologize for Randy and Jack's behavior. We don't approve of it and even thought it was a bit confusing, what you did, we did think it was funny," he said to Ten. "Me and my wife and Ruth are staying for supper and we just wanted to tell you that you're very welcome in our family, at least the sane portion of it," he said with a wink. "We heard reports of aliens on the TV but they seemed to be dangerous. But Lori and Jim said you've been just wonderful with the children and you haven't hurt anyone so I'm glad there are nice aliens out there. Although, you seem to be nosy aliens," he said while everyone laughed. "I just would like to say one thing to the aliens here, just a friendly request."  
  
"And that would be?" Eleven said.  
  
"Don't mutilate the cows around here," he said with a twinkle in his eyes. "Lori's neighbors wouldn't like that."  
  
He grinned when everyone laughed.  
  
"We promise not to harm the cattle in any way," Ten said, crossing his hearts.  
  
"Good, that's all I ask in return for you visiting here," he said with a smile. "And Lori says this is your spaceship," he said, pointing to the TARDIS.  
  
"It is indeed," Eleven said. "Please, come inside and see for yourself."  
  
He snapped his fingers and opened the doors. He went inside with Great Uncle Tom and helped him up the stairs, showing him the console and explaining what some of the doodahs did while everyone else continued to look through the boxes.  
  
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO  
  
After they finished exploring the storage room, they hung out in the den while Great Uncle Tom went back upstairs. The TV was on but they busied themselves lounging around and chatting while drinking some soda. While they were chatting, Alicia came downstairs and Rory jumped up to help her come down.  
  
"Thank you, are you an alien too?" Alicia said when Rory reached her side.  
  
"No, I'm human," he said, taking her arm.  
  
"I wanted to get a closer look at the aliens since I know what they are now," she said with a wink as Rory helped her downstairs. "Not often we get aliens here, especially ones that look like people."  
  
Eleven and Ten hopped up and walked over to the stairs, standing at the bottom while Alicia came down. She studied them when she reached the bottom.  
  
"Are you brothers? Lori tried to explain but I'm afraid I wasn't clear on your relationship to each other," she said.  
  
"No, actually we're the same man," Eleven said. "Come and sit down and we'll try to clear that up."  
  
They walked her to the sofa and she sat down on the edge of it. Eleven sat down beside her and Ten crouched down beside it while they tried to explain the concept of regeneration to her.  
  
"So…" Alicia said when they finished their explanation, "you're the same as he is," she said, pointing to Eleven while she addressed Ten, "but in a different body."  
  
"Yes. I'm the same man at a basic level but I do get a new body and personality each time I regenerate,"  
  
"But isn't it weird being in the same room with yourself?" Alicia said, pointing to Eleven.  
  
"Um, yeah, it is," Ten said, grinning while everyone laughed. "And I'm not supposed to do it, especially with a future self since I'm not supposed to know my own future. But Donna and I couldn't resist coming here and helping out so I made an exception this time."  
  
"Well, I'm glad you're here," Alicia said. "And Lori told me to tell you that she is making everyone enchiladas tonight."  
  
The children whooped and hollered.  
  
"Apparently, that's a good thing," Rory said.  
  
"Mommy's enchiladas are goooood," Michelle said, rubbing her belly.  
  
"We get them as a special treat sometimes," Brittany said. "You'll love them."  
  
"Well, can't wait to have these special enchiladas then if they're that nummy," Ten said.  
  
"I'm going to go back upstairs and take a nap before that happens," Alicia said. "I just wanted to tell you that I'm glad you're here and I'm glad you're friendly aliens. I'll see you later."  
  
"Enjoy your nap," Eleven said.  
  
Rory stood up and helped Alicia up the stairs while the others resumed their conversation.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


	28. Teaspoon :: Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving by cheri

[](http://www.whofic.com/)

|  [Home](http://www.whofic.com/) | [Most Recent](http://www.whofic.com/search.php?action=recent) | [Categories](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php) | [Authors](http://www.whofic.com/authors.php?list=authors) | [Titles](http://www.whofic.com/titles.php) | [Help](http://www.whofic.com/help.php) | [Search](http://www.whofic.com/search.php) | [Log In](http://www.whofic.com/user.php) |   
---  
[Eleventh Doctor](http://www.whofic.com/categories.php?catid=18)  
---  
**Happy Hillbilly Thanksgiving** by [cheri](http://www.whofic.com/viewuser.php?uid=1862) [[Reviews](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116363) \- [6](http://www.whofic.com/reviews.php?sid=48529&chapid=116363)] [Chapter](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=28) **or** [Story](http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?action=printable&textsize=0&sid=48529&chapter=all)   
  
  
1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28

  
  
.Chapter Twenty Eight  
  
Everyone spent the afternoon chatting and relaxing and watching the TV. Brittany told them about a special event that was going to be broadcast during the evening.  
  
"They have this old Civil War monument in downtown Indianapolis and they string lights on it every year and light it up. They're gonna do it tonight if you want to watch," she said to them.  
  
"Sounds great!" Ten said.  
  
"Wait, Civil War?" Eleven said with wide eyes. "Is Randy and Jack going to be there then?"  
  
"Yeah, they might object to a Civil War monument being decorated for Christmas," Ten said with wide eyes while everyone laughed. "After all, that's a sacred object. It commemorated the time the US split in two and they fought over it. Or is that still going on? I'm not quite sure," Ten added, rubbing his cheek while he pretended to think.  
  
"I think it's still going on," Eleven said. "I mean they put the Confederate flag on their motor, right? So it must still be happening?"  
  
"Blimey, what if we did something to muck up history and this is some sort of alternate future where the American Civil War is still happening," Ten said to his counterpart.  
  
"Then that explains the pigheaded, racist behavior earlier," Eleven said, slapping his head while everyone laughed harder. "Everyone better hide the darkies then."  
  
"Yes, the darkies and deer and bunnies are in danger when those two are around," Ten said.  
  
"You know, it's gonna totally suck around here when you leave," Brittany said while she lay on her blankets.  
  
"Yeah, I wish you didn't have to go," Michelle said while she rested in her beanbag.  
  
"I know, poppet, but we have to go eventually," Eleven said. "We have things to do. Planets to save, civilizations to rescue."  
  
"Rednecks to annoy," Amy said while she and Rory lay on their sleeping bags.  
  
"Bunnies to shoot," River said while she lay on the sofa behind the Doctors.  
  
"And don't forget asking cows for directions," Rory said.  
  
"But you have to have enchiladas first," Michelle said.  
  
"Are these enchiladas out of this world?" Ten asked her.  
  
"Mm-hmmm," Michelle said, nodding.  
  
"What makes them special?" Donna said.  
  
"Mom takes a tortilla as big as the plate and puts hamburger and mushroom gravy on it and then puts a layer of cheese and a layer of onions and another tortilla shell and another layer of hamburger and mushroom gravy and onions and cheese on top and enchilada sauce and bakes it in the oven until it's warm and gooey," Brittany said.  
  
"Ooo, that sounds very nummy," Eleven said to Ten.  
  
"Yup, will have to hang around for that then," Ten said.  
  
"And sometimes she makes nachos too," Michelle said. "It's gooooood."  
  
"I'm going to burst from all the numminess around here," Eleven said.  
  
"I know, I'll lose my mind from the sheer numminess," Ten added.  
  
XOXOXOXOXOXOXO  
  
After telling them about the enchiladas, the Doctors were glad when Lori finally announced they were finished. They went upstairs to a mixture of good smells and went into the kitchen. The counter had been cleared of the Thanksgiving food and in its place were several plates with individual enchiladas on them along with a large plate of nachos with melted cheese, refried beans and sour cream on top and glasses of pop. They took everything to the table and the counter and feasted on the gooey enchiladas and crispy nachos while Lori and her family ate in the living room and chatted.  
  
"Oh God, this is just brilliant," Amy said after taking another bite of gooey enchilada. "This is so much better than being chased by monsters."  
  
"I think I'm gonna get fat in one day from all this," Rory said while Amy nodded. "But it'll be worth it."  
  
"I don't think I'll be able to move after I finish," Eleven sighed, patting his belly. "I think you'll have to get a forklift and put me back in the TARDIS because I'll barely be able to move."  
  
He smiled when Lori's family laughed at that from the other room.  
  
"I think they like the enchiladas," they heard Jim say.  
  
"I think that's an understatement," River said. "Never got anything like this at Stormcage, that's for sure."  
  
"Ooo, I think I'm spent," Ten said, slumping back in his chair. "I think that's it for me. I can't move anymore. Someone could enslave me right here and I wouldn't have the strength to resist."  
  
"You know, I could make more for you to take with you when you leave," Lori called out from the living room.  
  
"She wants us to get fat and never move again," Eleven said loudly while Lori and her family laughed. "But despite my better judgment, please, by all means…make more, Lori!" he yelled while they laughed harder.  
  
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO  
  
After eating, the Doctor's pretended to trod downstairs while grunting and groaning to the delight of Lori's family. Brittany turned on the TV and everyone lay around, satiated, while they watched the lighting of the monument.  
  
"Are you leaving now?" Michelle said, coming up to the sofa and looking at Eleven who was laying there with River.  
  
"Leave? I can't bloody move any longer!" Eleven said while everyone laughed hysterically. "I think I really do need a forklift. But I'll tell you what. We'll spend one more night and leave in the morning so we can recover from this orgy of food. But we really must leave in the morning, okay?"  
  
Michelle nodded sadly and Eleven rubbed her cheek when he noticed her eyes misting over.  
  
"I'll be back, love. I have to now that I know this gastric wonder is here," he joked, patting his belly. "I'll be back at Christmas, alright?"  
  
Michelle beamed and the children cheered while the Doctor smiled.  
  
XOXOXOXOXOXOXO  
  
The next morning, Lori and Jim came to see their friends off. During the night, Ruth left with Alicia and Great Uncle Tom, so it was just them and the children standing in front of the TARDIS. The children had tears in their eyes and Eleven and his friends and family hugged them all tightly and promised they'd be back to visit for Christmas.  
  
"At least my group will, don't know about him," Eleven said, pointing to Ten.  
  
"I think we might visit on other days. I really shouldn't mix with my future self but Donna and I will try to come and see you again when we can," he said to them.  
  
"Please be careful, all of you," Lori said. "If you're out there, keeping the universe safe, keep yourselves safe too."  
  
"We will," Eleven said, hugging her again.  
  
He chuckled when Lori handed him two huge metal pans covered with aluminum foil.  
  
"Fuel for your adventures," Lori said with a wink as Amy and Rory took the pans.  
  
"You just want me to be tubby, don't you?" Eleven said. "You want us to get addicted to this stuff so we keep coming back."  
  
"Yes. So come back often," Lori said, patting his cheek.  
  
Eleven hugged all of the children again and kissed their cheeks. When he got to Michelle, she hugged him extra tight.  
  
"I love you," she whispered in his ear.  
  
"And I love you. You be good and keep reading and be brilliant," he said, patting her back while she hugged him.  
  
He kissed her cheek one more time before letting go. The children waved to him while he clicked his fingers and the TARDIS doors opened.  
  
"Listen for the wheezing sound, that'll be the signal that we returned," Eleven said while everyone else walked inside the TARDIS.  
  
He waved to his new friends and they waved back while he followed everyone inside. He smiled, winked and shut the door and everyone watched in wonder as the wheezing noise started and the TARDIS slowly faded away in front of them.  
  
THE END.  
  


1\. Chapter 12. Chapter 23. Chapter 34. Chapter 45. Chapter 56. Chapter 67. Chapter 78. Chapter 89. Chapter 910. Chapter 1011. Chapter 1112. Chapter 1213. Chapter 1314. Chapter 1415. Chapter 1516. Chapter 1617. Chapter 1718. Chapter 1819. Chapter 1920. Chapter 2021. Chapter 2122. Chapter 2223. Chapter 2324. Chapter 2425. Chapter 2526. Chapter 2627. Chapter 2728. Chapter 28  
  
Doctor Who and its accoutrements are the property of the BBC, and we obviously don't have any right to them. Any and all crossover characters belong to their respective creators. Alas no one makes any money from this site, and it's all done out of love for a cheap-looking sci-fi show. All fics are property of their individual authors. Archival at this site should not be taken to constitute automatic archive rights elsewhere, and authors should be contacted individually to arrange further archiving. Despite occasional claims otherwise, The Blessed St Lalla Ward is not officially recognised by the Catholic Church. Yet.   
  
Script for this archive provided by [eFiction](http://efiction.sourceforge.net/). Contact our archivists at [help@whofic.com](mailto:help@whofic.com). Please read our [Terms of Service](http://www.whofic.com/tos.php) and [Submission Guidelines](http://www.whofic.com/guidelines.php). 


End file.
